The more I write, the more I am drawn to a cluster of similar phrases to describe my character's emotions - either phrases I have used previously or, worse still, common cliches. I've run out of intelligent ways to convey surprise and fear, for example, without repeating myself. In characters other than the narrator, the temptation to describe facial expressions or use of eyes is irresistable but seems hackneyed to me, though far better than the character describing their emotions! Any suggestions?

Cheers

Andy

Yes, it is a problem, isn't it. There are only so many times you can make someone's hands shake. I try to comfort myself that only I know my work well enough to notice the repeats, and almost no-one is going to read several pieces back to back, and start noticing.

Can how they say other things clue the reader in to how they're feeling? Even just tone of voice? A phrase I wish didn't now sound so old-fashioned is 'in a low tone' because it has all sorts of implications beyond simple description of volume.

Or what they do physically? A cliche might be that they run their finger round inside their collar because it suddenly feels tight, but there are others.

The narrator uses a simile or metaphor that conveys a feeling beyond what s/he actually observes of the frightened one's physical action and state? My favourite comic example of this is in Wodehouse, when Bertie surprises his aunt:

She had the expression of a woman who, having been picking daisies on a branch line, is suddenly hit in the small of the back by the London to Edinburgh express.

I don't think I could easily describe her expression, but I know just what she looks like!

Emma

Thanks Emma. I've used a variety of metaphors too, and found myself editing some out for the same reason: too many within the same passage sounds cheap and unimaginative, though the Wodehouse example is first rate! Better to ration them for maximum effect.

Cheers

Andy