Hi there, just joined as a trial member after always dipping into the forums over the past year or so.
Now I have a question if you guys will be kind enough to answer it for me. I wrote a novel this year, it was in no particular genre, it was about a girl growing up in the 70s. I then sent it to a really great agent and they wrote back and said they loved my writing but as the book is not in any specific genre it would be difficult to sell it etc etc. They then said they would be really keen to see anything I write in the future. I then sat down and wrote a novel which fell into the crime genre, though it is very charater driven. ie, ordinary people who happen to get caught up in extrodinary circumstances. I was pleased with it and sent it off to the agent. I then spoke to them on the phone and they said that they hadn't had time to read it but they will in the second week of Jan but in the meantime maybe I should take on board the comments from the assistant who had read half of it. The comments were; found it confusing the first couple of chapters as not quite sure who killer is and how graphic do I need to be! Ok well the first novel I sent to them, the assistant said she found confusing(quite how that was I'm not sure)however the agent didn't. Again the assistant didn't like the first novel but the agent did but just didn't think it was commercially viable. Now this crime novel I have given it to a couple of people, who are not my nearest and dearest and they didn't find it confusing. I have the feeling that the assistant would like me to reveal the id of the killer straight away but how fun is that for the reader? Or maybe I should reveal them and just have the reader on the same journey as the killer. Not sure. What do you guys think? Should I reveal who it is or not? plus, do you think I should take any notice of this assistant at all and just go with what I originally wrote, bearing in mind her comments on my first novel? The second question is, about the graphic content. I'm a woman and don't think that you should just write about violence on women just for the sake of it, however I didn't think that it was over the top at all and stopped far short of gratitious violence but I did feel that it needed the amount I put in it. Again what do you guys think? Should I listen to this assistant or not? I'm thinking that the assistant and the agent maybe have the same wave of thinking, otherwise she wouldn't be the assistant. Oh heck, I don't know I thought I had it all worked out. Obviously if the agent took me on then I guess you would automatically discuss and do the rewrites but as they haven't yet, I'm not quite sure what to do. I don't want to blow my chance but at the same time, I'm not sure if the assistants comments are correct. Gosh, that was long and no doubt full of spelling mistakes and grammatical errors! Forgive me as I don't think there is a spell check on the new topic forum!! Thanks and happy new year x

Hi,

As it's crime, no i don't see the point in revealing the killer straight away. It is possible that that is not what the assistant meant, but just worded it poorly. Maybe the opening chapters have too much background info and character introduction, and they just want you to bring the main plot thread forward, into the early chapters.

I would be tempted to wait for the agent's comments on it, before doing any sort of rewrite. It may be the agent's suggestions won't echo the assistants's; or maybe the agent will word it better than the assistant. Either way I wouldn't rush into anything for the time being.


- NaomiM

<Added>

As for violence. Some authors like the husband & wife team Nicci French are well known for the graphic violence in theri novels, and that attracts a certain type of readership. If the agent thinks the novel will attract a different type of readership - eg, the Midsomer Murders audeince - then they might suggest toning it down. Again, wait for the Agent to get back to you, and trust their instinct as to what the target readersip is likely to prefer.


<Added>

Just to add, as you found with the first mss there is a difference between writing well, and writing what would be considered a commercial proposition. This is where an Agent's assistance is invaluable.

Hi Happyhour, and welcome to WriteWords

I'd agree with Naomi, and suggest that you wait for the agent's opinion. 'Confusing' is very subjective stuff, which doesn't mean that you shouldn't take note of people who say they're confused, only that, as you've found, different people read very differently.

It's important to remember that if a reader who you trust (or need to take note of, like a professional) says they're confused (or bored, or don't believe X or weren't convinced by Y) that you have to take that seriously. But what you don't have to do is to tackle the problem in the way they suggest: the problem, and the solution, are two different things. For example, the assistant may say 'I was in a muddle because I didn't know who the killer was', it may not be a matter of revealing the killer earlier. I agree that, if that's how the book works, then that's how it works. So, how else could you make things less confusing? Is it a matter of not making the road straighter, but planting more signposts? Don't forget, you know what you're hinting at, trying to imply, will be saying soon... but a reader doesn't. It doesn't mean that the castle needs to be any less twisty and complicated, just that they need a few more handholds, and chances to glance out of the windows to orient themselves in the wider landscape.

What you could do, while you're waiting for the agent to read it, is have a think about how you might tackle it, if the agent agrees with the assistant, and you decide you do need to de-confuse the opening. Then, if you do get to the point of having a conversation about the book, you should be able to transmit some confidence that you can solve the problem without changing the essential nature of the book, or losing what makes it work.

And with graphic - you'll always get a variety of views on this one. You could always double-check that there's a good reason for all the explicit stuff, and that it's earning its keep in terms of adding to plot, theme, character etc. And also find other successful writers in your part of the genre who are that graphic to bolster your argument. Then readers are less likely to read it as gratuitous and unnecessary (though there'll always be some...)

And very best of luck!

Emma

found it confusing the first couple of chapters as not quite sure who killer is

Just to add, is it clear who the main character is in the opening chapters? If the opening chapters are a graphic murder scene, ask yourself if that is necessary, or are you using it to bolster an otherwise slow start.