Apologies in advance for the long post! I've just had a rejection on a full manuscript by an agent who read it the day I emailed it over and responded the next. Unfortunately it was a no. Despite being very positive about aspects of the novel, this agent felt some fundamentals needed revising before she would take another look.

While not being anti-revision (okay, who loves it really...) my dilemma is this. I really can't work out whether her comments are valid. I've been working on this children's novel (9-14 age range) on and off for a number of years. I sent it out to three agencies a few years ago and one requested the full, then rejected. I had a critique done in the light of those rejection comments but it was disappointing. The critique seemed to be suggesting I write an entirely different novel.

However, I did realise the book needed more depth so I added another subplot in a major rewrite, then sent it off for another crit (I didn't want to 'use up' anymore agents before I knew the book really stood up.) This second critique was very positive indeed - the reviewer really seemed to understand the novel and just suggested some minor changes which I duly made and felt added to the book.

I then sent the book out to four more agents. Two requested the full. I'm still waiting for one verdict, and am struggling to assimilate the other. Basically, this agent felt the book was too long at 47,000 words, yet when the novel was 27,000 I was told it was too short. She felt the plot arc was weak and the central character was too unsympathetic. I was really surprised at both comments - they didn't ring true at all for me and weren't issues raised by the last crit.

The agent says she wants to see a revised version. I am experienced enough to know that even this much from an agent is positive, and I would really like to accommodate her suggested changes. But I can't help but feel they would result in an entirely different novel from the one I have written.

I dunno. Am feeling worn down by it all. What do you all think? Should I rewrite with my heart not in it, or accept that I need to find that agent who really does 'get' it. Or should I just give up on the poor book entirely? I think in a way I'd rather do that than be pushed into writing something I didn't really believe in or feel good about.

Thank you for your time and patience!

EmmaH

Hi, Emma, and welcome to WriteWords

This is a scenario familiar to a number of writers - it's just one more hurdle that agents like to put us through on the way to publication.

I think, firstly, with such a good hit rate of requests for 'fulls' you should carry on submitting to agents (at least a couple of dozen) in the hope of finding one of them who gets it.

Secondly other agents may well ask for rewrites before deciding whether or not to sign you up, so you may as well have the practice and go through with the rewrite for this particular agent - now is definitely not the time to give up.

You have placed it in the 9-14 readership which straddles the 9-12 and YA/Teen groups, so it may be falling between two stools, which may be why the agents are asking for a rewrite.

Yes, I too suspect the agent who has asked for the rewrite has in mind a novel that is different from the one you've written, but that is sometimes what it takes to whip a mss into a commercial proposition for publishers.

You are welcome to post the synopsis in the Synopsis and Outline group if you would like a fresh opinion on the novel's structure.


- NaomiM

<Added>

Just to add, 27K would be too short for a novel in this age range, but 47K should not be classed as too long. It may be that with the addition of the sub-plot, the agent is more concerned about a convoluted plot, rather than it's overall length, and would prefer a simpler plot, preferably without shrinking the word count too much.

<Added>

Since you are straddling two readerships, you might find that one agent will want a rewrite to bring it into the pre-teen readership (9-12yrs), while another will want it to fit a YA/Teen readership (12-15yrs). If so you will need to decide which readership to aim for.

Hi EmmaH, and welcome to WW.

Naomi's much more experienced than I am in kid fic/YA, but I do wonder if it would be wise to wait and see what other feedback you get from other agents. As you've discovered, how even industry insiders react to your work varies a lot, and can't help but be subjective. I know writers who've had diametrically opposed opinions on their work, depending on how the agent read it, and then what the agent thought needed doing, to make it what the agent thought it ought to be. There are three points in that process where opinions could diverge...

Do the revisions suggested resonate with you? There are always some which make you think 'Yeah, you're right', and others which make you thing 'wtf?'. If you really feel that revising it along the lines suggested would change the nature of the project, then I'd suggest that you go cautiously.

As a general rule doing revisions which your heart isn't in, on the basis of one opinion, isn't the best course. If you're getting this kind of response, and have done in the past as well, your writing obviously has what it takes. There might well be an agent who falls in love with it pretty much as it is, so you might want to consider trying it on more agents, and seeing what kind of respons you get, before you start revising.

Emma

Emma is the voice of reason & experience.
One thing that rewriting does is establishes a connection/dialogue with that agent, but if you are given little in the way of direction from them it may be a thankless and ultimately futile task.

<Added>

On the one hand that's good, in that you can address the rewrites direct to that agent and be reasonably confident they'll read it rather than it sitting on the slush pile waiting for the summer interns to sort out.
on the other hand you don't want to find yourself putting all your eggs in the one basket in the hope that this agent will eventually sign you up.

Thank Naomi and Emma. Your prompt responses much appreciated. I think they have certainly helped consolidate mine. This agent's comments definitely triggered a 'wtf' reaction rather than the 'yeah, you're right'. I think if it were the latter I'd quite happily - okay, maybe with a bit of huffing and puffing - undertake a rewrite. But I feel she's asking me to write a completely different book.

For instance, if she finds the heroine, Janie, 'unsympathetic', then she and I are definitely not singing from the same hymn sheet. The whole novel hinges on the heroine's relative immaturity and lack of insight, and what ensues from that - I feel she's wholly a sympathetic character, if a flawed one. I really, really don't want to change her.

So, I guess my gut feel is that no matter how good it is to have an agent interested, I just can't accommodate her viewpoint. I don't want to write the kind of book I think she's after. So I'd probably just make a complete mess of it anyway.

I guess what I really want is to hang out for that agent/publisher who really gets Janie's character and dilemmas, and is rooting for her all the way. I want that person to like her as much as I do, not want to turn her into some bland teenager from a rewrite of 'The Parent Trap'. So I'm going to go with the suggestion that I still keep sending it out there. Having been a hack for years I've churned out enough cr*p with no trace of my heart in it; I'm not about to start doing it as a novelist.

Jaded, moi? :-)

Hugs and thanks again,

Emma

To be honest, 'unsympathetic character' is one reason why many Agents will reject an mss. If you have deliberately written your character like that then, I'm sorry to say, but you might well have difficulty finding an agent for the mss.



- NaomiM

True, though even that can be subjective, I think - I know people who've had rejections saying that, when another agent absolutely loves the character.

Emma

Naomi, I really don't think the character is unsympathetic - she's just a mixed up, confused teen - which is why I find this agent's response difficult to assimilate. And this is not a 'criticism' that has been levelled before. The person who did the literary critique really warmed to her.

I think Emma is right. Some people just have different reactions to characters, just as they do to people in real life.

Perhaps I'll post some of it as suggested, so you can see what you think!

Hi Emma,

I just read your post over on the Children's group, in response to mine complaining about the exact same situation! i.e a third request for the full m/s

I have sent it to five so far - two rejected it immediately, two requested the full and subsequently rejected it, and I'm now awaiting the response of number 5!

Of the two that rejected it, both praised my writing and said they would love to see further work from me (but that's not much good at this stage, is it?!). One rejected it because she wanted something adventurous and fast paced, whereas my story is more of a revealing-of-family-secrets kind of book. A child version of the type of books I like myself!

The other one gave me two pages of feedback, some of which I thought was useful and some of which wasn't. For example, she said that she couldn't really 'pin down' the main character because she seemed to be a child at the beginning and a teen at the end.... which was exactly what intended! She did make me realise, though, that the book fell between two stools - it was neither a child's book or a YA book, so I had to decide whether to rewrite it one way or the other. I actually tried both! I began rewriting it with the main character much older, but soon realised it wasn't right. So I cut some of the bits that were more teen-related, and kept the plot simpler (that was another criticism - too complicated for the age group).

Anyway, it's been cut from 42,000 words to 34,000 and hopefully more streamlined, so we'll see what happens next. But I have to say, that I am so encouraged by this forum and will send it to a stack more agents before I give up on it!

look forward to hearing good news! (Are you allowed to say which agent is looking at it? Wouldn't it be funny if it was the same one?!)

freebird