I have been ill for some time, and have been trying to find a way to explain to my family what it feels like. I thought a short story might be the best medium, so I have writen this. I know it is very self indulgent, but I need to know if it reads well. Any suggestions to give it more impact would be wonderful. Thanks.

<Added>

sorry, hope this works better
http://www.writewords.org.uk/archive/13576.asp

it goes to .co.uk rather than .org.uk

http://www.writewords.org.uk/archive/13576.asp

mas

Thanks!