Hey, now I don't mean to be all look at my stuff again but here me out.

Site expert Simon Trewin has left a somewhat cryptic message as a comment on my umoaded work. I have emailed him to ask him if he could elaborate. No joy. I have scratched my noggin til it bled. Just what does he mean?

Anyone? Does anyone has a clue. Any idea at all?

Let me know

What piece of work was it, where is it? I'll have a go at interpretation for you.

I think he's just saying half of it is excellent, while the other half lets it down. If the excellent half is more representative of the entirety of the work, then you're due some praise.

And praise from Simon Trewin, who happens to be a literary agent, is quite rare in these parts.

Hi Becca,

The piece is feeling Gravitys Pull and I think you've already taken a look at at.

Bartender

I get the whole 50% malarkey but the thing is the 50% I think he's referring to as being not so good is integral. I think he meant the angrier stuff but that resolves itself as the character learns to let go of all his hate and open himself up more.

But then I could be wrong. I'm not trying to find out what he thinks would sell well. I just want to know which is which if you know what I mean.

Yes, I did read his comment. I haven't a clue what he means, I'll read it again and see if I can guess.

I can only assume it's something to do with the way your character is expressing his despair. I wonder what would happen if you just tightened it all up and edited those sections down. In a way, once you have established his position and his mind set, the reader will carry that knowledge as they go along with him on his various journeys.
He seems to me like a very depressed man, all right, but I don't warm to him as an adult the way I did when he was a child.
This is probably not very helpful, and anyway you said it was a novel so again there is the problem of looking through a tiny peephole at part of something.

If you at all interested Becca I'd be happy to mail you what I have so far. Just over 23000 words in total. still in rough form but enough to get the gist of it

I'd rather see the finished product, Geoff, I meant only that on the novel writing site, you have to make allowances for what went before and what might come after, .. Whereas, with shorts you get the whole lot,.. it's a tighter more exacting discipline, I think, can't get away with anything in a good short.