Hi Janeyboo,
does't sound sad at all! It sounds like a positive and sensible way of helping yourself come to terms with your new situation.
Why not come and join the Childrens' and YA Writers' Group. We'd love to have you there - it's a very friendly and supportive group, and I'm sure you also will have a mine of useful knowledge that would be interesting to us, too!
<Added>just checked out your profile, too - I think you'll find some very like-minded people on here. Lots of knowledgable CW lecturers
Of which I am not one!