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Nothing Lasts Forever
Posted: 18 May 2005
Word Count: 81
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Beautiful vessel
He once captained her
Proud to steer her
Ploughing through
Calm waters
Riding the waves
Her destiny in his hands
Surviving storms
For a while, but
Thrash after thrash
She weathered
Sadness overcame him
Knowing he couldn’t
Keep her forever
He had sailed with her
As far as he could go
Slowly, he tore himself
Away, let her drift
Lacking the love of her captain,
She sank, a dreary vision
Of what once was
She lived in his memory
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Comments by other Members
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 joanie at 17:45 on 18 May 2005
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Hi Lisa. I enjoyed reading this aloud. I love the form and the line length. I am getting mixed feelings about the subject matter. At first I thought that the ending would be that 'she' would sail alone, finally independent of the 'captain'. I'm a bit disappointed that she sank. Perhaps it's the feminist in me which I didn't know existed!
I really did enjoy the read.
joanie
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 James Graham at 13:02 on 19 May 2005
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There's something touching about this, like a folk-tale or a children's story - 'Once upon a time there was a mariner...' There could be a story in it - the solitary mariner is a young prince who has been disinherited by his wicked father the King; his adventures are a bit like Gulliver's, he meets strange beings on remote islands; but at last he has 'sailed with her as far as he could go' and lets his boat drift. But like Joanie I wish the boat would drift away out of sight, a free spirit!
James.
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 Tina at 13:29 on 19 May 2005
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Hi
This is an intriguing piece packed with all kinds of meaning like the best folk and fairy tales.
Beautiful vessel
He once captained her
He had sailed with her
As far as he could go
Kind of Angela Carter but not prose
Lovely mystical feel to it - unwinds like a reel - relationships journey fitted into such short lines
Lovely
Thanks
T
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Ambitions of Lisa at 14:20 on 19 May 2005
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Thanks Joanie, Stephen, James and Tina...
I think I was feeling slightly emotional when I wrote this piece, and looking back I think I agree with the more positive, "drifitng away" option rather than the "sinking" one for the ending.
But yes... I like the overall feel I got from this one :)
Lis
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Ticonderoga at 14:34 on 19 May 2005
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Long live metaphor! Excellent. The imagery resounds. Very moving.
Love & Mercy,
Mike
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engldolph at 18:14 on 29 May 2005
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Hi Lisa,
I liked the feel of this too..on the level of a mariner's story...it flows really well and has a touching feel to it... for me it captures well the journey of a man and an object that he loves (a boat, a car) but doesn't work so well as a metaphor for a relationship if that's where you were headed with this...
enjoyed
Mike
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