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by Lawrenco 

Posted: 16 April 2005
Word Count: 138
Summary: My Leap into Performance Poetry ,a finalist in "Short Fuse`s,Poetry Idol".Had a great time but didn`t win ,early days ah!

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Flyers handed out,will it be alright on the night ?
Oh yea some fame game bid?"Poetry idol 5!"
I`m worried about the mike,it`s just a an expression I don`t want to deny!
Thought I was going to be fit ,a pair of 34",Jeans,
Snugly tightly ,a little fat fit,I must admit.
I thought of learning my lines ,kept them though;thought I would lose it!
Six little kinda eggs ,clickity,click.
Pick out where the toys used to recide,
names curled up like a spring inside.
Jack`n box,me to be picked ,the last hit on the stage I start to recite.
I had a good time kicking out those poems,boom or bust ,
my first real performance,so an experiance thrust!
I didn`t win on the day,
just happy to be accepted to be able to perform and write ,my way!

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Comments by other Members

joanie at 11:17 on 16 April 2005  Report this post
Sorry you didn't win but well done for being a finalist! You have conveyed the feelings which must surface at times like that, I'm sure. I can picture you clutching your lines secretly, like a comfort blanket, just in case......... and wondering how you look.

Vivid picture - keep trying; it sounds like you will!


Fearless at 11:56 on 16 April 2005  Report this post
It was a barnstorming performance, well done - I was dead proud!

Write on, Fearless


You didn't come first, but I know you didn't come last. Not sure about the 'twat in the hat'!


Ticonderoga at 13:39 on 16 April 2005  Report this post
Know how you feel - I had a go at the Poetry Cafe a couple of weeks ago, and this sums it up very nicely!



Lawrenco at 13:57 on 16 April 2005  Report this post
Sorry hadn`t finished the complete picture have finished the poem now!
Feel such a chump!Having grief loading up,but sorted out know.

I hope Joanie this gives a clearer picture!
It was a really good experience!
you can`t win them all ,great to hear you had a go at it Mike!
I hope you like the updted work fearless,thanks Bros!

miffle at 14:39 on 16 April 2005  Report this post
Good for you Patrick! Loved the lines:

I had a good time kicking out those poems, boom or bust/ my first real performance, so an experiance thrust'

AKA Tom Jones of poetry I thought ;-)
An energising piece as I am sure the adrenaline was on the night!

Like the idea of 'fat fit'... Yes I think a verging on torturous way of picking order... Did you read the Ant Stamp poem? I always liked that one...

Miffed to have missed you... Will you read again?

Nikki :-)

Lawrenco at 19:08 on 17 April 2005  Report this post
Hi Nikki,Thanks for the comment,I did do the Black Ant Foot Stomp,sorry you missed it .
Next time will publicise better!

paul53 [for I am he] at 19:45 on 17 April 2005  Report this post
Hi Patrick,
Didn't this appear in the Archive the other day? I thought you were sneaking one in like I do with poems that are a bit long or obscure.
Performance poetry? You are very brave. Stick me in front of an audience and you get a silent statue. Ply me with drink first and I'd bore everyone with a ten-hour life story. When I remarried in '95, the vicar asked "if the groom would like to say a few words?"
"Nope," I replied.
On a minor note, I find your poems easier on my old bloodshot eyes if you leave a space after punctuation, like this. Or this.
Well done for being a finalist.

Lawrenco at 22:11 on 17 April 2005  Report this post
Hi Paul , I started to upload poem ran out of time posted half of it so it was incomplete ;but anyway thanks for comments, will not try to compact so much!
Thanks for the pointers.

gard at 23:57 on 19 April 2005  Report this post
Hey congratulation son even getting to the semis!!!! Well done you, keep it up. Like the memoir piece here. Very solid and lots of images. What did you perform?


Lawrenco at 01:58 on 21 April 2005  Report this post
Hi Gard, Yea it was a realy good experience got my creative thoughts going to get to the finals was good enough for a first submission.There a good crowd down at "short fuse",keep on truckin as they say!!!


The Poems I did were More Squirel moments,The Aprehensive mint,The Black Ant Foot Stamp,Sausage Sandwich,Flock... Imagined(which had been reviced).

TheGodfather at 14:44 on 25 April 2005  Report this post
Poetry Idol. That's hilarious. I'm proud of you just for entering it. That takes guts to go on Poetry Idol. And to make it to the finalists. Kudos.


Lawrenco at 23:59 on 10 May 2005  Report this post
Thanks Godfather,for the Kudos.
Great to hear from you again.

Mr B. at 21:02 on 04 June 2005  Report this post
Hi Pat!

Nice work - most of the pieces I've read of yours have had a style crying out for performance! I liked this - was quite jazzy and in-your-face! I'm not really up on the ins and outs of performance poetry so can't give anything particularly contructive. Still, I liked it from my own perspective!

Nice one,


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