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Love for Life
Posted: 09 February 2005 Word Count: 47 Summary: For Valentines, possibly
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To be alive is one thing yet living live a lie wrapped up in this consumerism repent before I die.
But just a moment spent within your sight a pause beneath your light is more than life's rich dream can bring to be with you is life.
Comments by other Members
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Jo Lamby at 22:03 on 09 February 2005
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Hi Carlton,
I love the 2nd stanza of your poem. Do you mind if I ask - in the first stanza, do you mean that all this consumerism is no way to live life and is therefore a lie ?
Jo
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Carlton at 18:00 on 10 February 2005
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In Essence yes; fed up with the throw away culture, and the problems it brings. Average borrowing debt in U.K 30,000 +, its no wonder people get so miserable, which of course affects/wrecks relationships.
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Carlton at 10:01 on 12 February 2005
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Is it acceptable to buy just a card?, listen to the advertising on all media at the moment, if you're not spending around £50.00 then the ad men haven't got you , which is good; but advertisers earn good money because they get us to spend spend spend, and borrow to do it. So even love has a consumerist slant now. This work is to someome I met who shuns all that is consumerist, and whose love, help and support will get me back on my feet.
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Jo Lamby at 14:56 on 13 February 2005
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Lucky you. Does she know you feel this strongly ? (I've read your other poems and they are very strong)
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Hamburger Yogi & PBW at 06:58 on 25 February 2005
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I thought the strongest part was 'a pause beneath your light is more than life's rich dream can bring' because of the fusion of sentiment with rythm. 'Consumerism' stretches that line a bit if 'lie' is to work with 'die'. Somehow 'life' at the end leaves the whole thing hanging (not sure why).
Hamburger Yogi
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Montog at 12:30 on 28 February 2005
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I agree with paul53, that second verse on its own is very emotive
enjoyed it!
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