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If life was made out of jaffa cake

by Jibunnessa 

Posted: 21 February 2003
Word Count: 148

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If life was made out of jaffa cake
I'd break off my left hand and give it to you
bleeding profusely
liquid orange jelly
dripping onto a white plate.

If life was made out of jaffa cake
I'd pull off strands of my hair
like the long strips of black liquorice of our childhoods
but in chocolate and orange with a thin vein of biscuit sponge.

If life was made out of jaffa cake
I'd walk through flames
and melt into a large white bowl
and with the force of my will
I would leave myself
on your window sill
to solidify and chill
and wait for you to consume me.

And if life was made out of jaffa cake
particles of me
would reside
in your belly
and others would gently curl
round your eyeballs
and the textures of your fingertips
and the roof of your mouth
and the surface of your tongue
and your memory.

So that you woke up at nights
as if roused
from a

---Jib, 9.06 am, 20 Feb 03

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Comments by other Members

Anna Reynolds at 18:31 on 22 February 2003  Report this post
delicious and slightly sinister, all at the same time.

skyblue2 at 17:41 on 07 March 2003  Report this post
I know what you mean but it made me uncomfortable as I could never give myself to anyone so completely and this made me very aware of that deficiency.

Lulahc at 01:06 on 10 March 2003  Report this post
moving and disturbing in a way. I loved this poem

Jibunnessa at 18:13 on 16 March 2003  Report this post
Hi to everyone who commented on this poem. I'm really glad you like it. And I can see why you might find it sinister, disturbing or uncomfortable. However, when writing it, I did so with a joyous heart and a big playful smile.

llydstp at 11:18 on 16 April 2003  Report this post
I could not find anything sinister in this poem - but I am one of those people who thinks that obsessive love is perfectly normal.
I liked the poem a lot, except for 'Eyeballs;' this word made me feel uncomfortable. Perhaps this word is too anatomical for me.

Jibunnessa at 23:45 on 16 April 2003  Report this post
No, I don't find anything really sinister about this poem either. It's NOT obsessive in a stalking sence. But more in the giving of yourself. I had great fun writing it - passion, surrealism and humour with a tinge of obsession ...with a smile.

Oh, and as for eyeballs being sinister... you've now drawn my attention to the fact that eyeballs recurr in my writing (check out: Shaquilla's Thoughts from 'Shaquilla's Papers'). Hmm... what does that say about me?

Anna Reynolds at 10:00 on 23 April 2003  Report this post
Maybe sinister is the wrong word- more overwhelming, obsessive, all-enveloping... you know, that kind of thing. But beautifully expressed through the language and visual imagery. Yeh, but go easy on the eyeballs huh?

Jibunnessa at 10:31 on 23 April 2003  Report this post
Not sure I can get away from eyeballs. They'll probably creep in somehow or other somewhere. Glad you like the visual imagery.

roger at 10:51 on 23 April 2003  Report this post

Hey Jib,

Just came across this and think I can explain the 'eyeball' bit. It was a crumb, right? Chomped a bit hard and a crumb flipped up and got caught under the top eyelid, right?

Actually, I don't think I fully understood it (It's a Derby thing, nothing to do with the poem itself) because I couldn't find the sinister bit, but I thought it was funny. I mean that in the nicest possible way, got a sort of warm feeling from it and found myself smiling that silly sort of gormless smile you smile when something's amusing you in a nice, relaxed way. Have I screwed up again? Got it all wrong again? Oh well, I did like it and that's what matter's, isn't it?

Mind you, I do worry about you sometimes. Who on earth would come up with the concept of life being a jaffa-cake? And I though I was loopy. Rambling, aren't I. Not really helpful. Better go. Sorry.

Jibunnessa at 11:00 on 23 April 2003  Report this post
Finally, somebody who understands the poem! But, not the crumbs flipping into the eyelids bit.

I too had a warm feeling and great big smile when writing it.

Glad you like it.

roger at 11:40 on 23 April 2003  Report this post
Bloody hell, Jib...I got it right? I'll have to leave Derby now; where will I go?

Jibunnessa at 11:45 on 23 April 2003  Report this post
They can't chuck you out. You don't have dual nationality!

...besides, after you've won the booker with your broken cats story, they'll soon call you back.

Shadowgirl at 13:22 on 23 April 2003  Report this post
Jolly Fisherman's waiting with open arms Rog! Always be a bit of beach with your name on it here.

Fearless at 15:25 on 21 August 2003  Report this post
Decadently & (digestively, longingly) tempestuously lovely!


Jibunnessa at 15:48 on 21 August 2003  Report this post
Cool :)

Cheers Woz.


Fearless at 15:54 on 21 August 2003  Report this post
Don't know what this means for my future relationships with jaffa cakes, but.....Woz

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