Californians should make a group New Year’s resolution
to change their windshield wipers
so that they’ll be ready before it starts raining
instead of setting themselves up
to be the brunt of all jokes in Seattle’s comedy clubs
when they can’t remember how
to press the metals hooks together
removing the old blade and inserting the new one
all the way to the bottom and then back up one notch
snapping into place until next year
when the poor state gets laughed at again.