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I wish you were here

by Stacey 

Posted: 24 June 2003
Word Count: 174
Summary: a little sad :0(


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I wish you were here.
I know you would have
loved that joke
as much as me.
You would have
laughed ‘til you were
blue in the face.
How ironic,
that’s the way you looked
the last time I saw you.

I wish you were here.
I know you would have
loved that film
as much as me.
You would have
wept ‘til you had
no tears left to cry.
Funny,
that’s just how I felt
when I said goodbye to you.

I wish you were here.
I know you would have
been so happy
to know that Jason
was going to propose to you.
I can see it now,
you would be speechless.
Strange,
That’s just how I last left you.
Lying still
Alone
Dead.

I wish you were here.
I know you would have
been so proud of us.
We are all coping well.
Jason,
your parents,
and the children.
They are fine.
They keep asking,
‘Where’s Mummy?’
I point to the stars
and tell them,
you are living with the angels.








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Comments by other Members



Okkervil at 20:56 on 24 June 2003  Report this post
I like this, especially the first two stanzas-where the mood makes you smile, even as you pick up the sombre tones. If'n y'don't mind me saying, I like reading your poetry, it's dead easy to read, and not pretentious, like those subjects can sometimes be (my friend Pieter writes poems similiarly themed to this all the time, and it drives me crazy. That and fairies). I mean he writes about fairies. They don't drive me crazy in the flesh . Ahem.

olebut at 23:01 on 24 June 2003  Report this post
Stacey

again I like this it has that wonderful quality of reminding us all of the conversations/ half prayers we say when we have lost somebody very close to us.

It is simple but the words and memories it evokes strike home yet in its way it isn't so sad as to be maudlin it has humour. Is the art of good poetry not teh technical qulaity of it but he abilty of the poet to get his readers to relate to the poem and to awkaen their emoions be they happy or sad etc.

take care

David

Ellenna at 12:30 on 25 June 2003  Report this post
this really did bring tears ..its so poignant. Like a prayer

Ellenna

poemsgalore at 19:01 on 25 June 2003  Report this post
Don't know if I've got this wrong, but I get the impression that he actually killed the woman he loved so someone else didn't take her away from him. Forgive me if that's not right. But I did enjoy the poem, it left a lump in my throat.

paul53 [for I am he] at 07:32 on 22 March 2005  Report this post
While I like this poem a great deal, I found the punctuation intruded, especially the full stops, which is a pity as this does the contents a disservice.

di2 at 09:18 on 14 October 2005  Report this post
Your poem moved me.


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