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LIFE

by roovacrag 

Posted: 19 December 2004
Word Count: 18


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Walk into the precipice of life
over shadowed with mundane grivancies
gratification,mutilation of the unknown
degradation,salutation no more.






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Comments by other Members



Mr B. at 10:28 on 22 December 2004  Report this post
Nice use of enjambement. Its rare to see a poem where the whole is one sentence. The last line reminded me of Hamlet's 'To be or not to be' -
'to die: to sleep:
no more;'
(III.i.60-61)

To encapsulate 'life' in four lines is a challenge, so well done! Mind you, Captain Darling in Blackadder IV does it in a word 'Bugger!'

Anthony

Lawrenco at 23:03 on 22 December 2004  Report this post
I must agree with Antony it does have a dramatic feel .Like a narrator of a play setting the scene.
Certainly on this occasion a bit grim,but powerfully phrased.
Nice one Alice.

TheGodfather at 16:17 on 24 December 2004  Report this post
Alice,

Overshadowed by a mundane precipice. I think I would expect that once in the precipice of life the shadow would be larger than mundane. This poem is large, the words, the size of the meaning of the words, except for the word 'mundane'. I wonder if you did that on purpose or if you could fine a word of larger scope than 'mundane'. Keep them coming.

TheGodfather


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