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Mal de mer

by joanie 

Posted: 12 December 2004
Word Count: 67
Summary: ...although it is a mill-pond just now


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Mid-grey. Not as dark
as slate, more
squirrel-like
(not red)
and just as cunning.

Looking appealing right
now, gentle
and undulating
(like fields)
but much more damp.

Smirking underneath,
ready to twirl,
are demons of its depths
(they hide)
who make it angry.

That misted monotone
churns and gurgles
into a raging foaming mass,
then the demonic smirkers
(having done their bit)
make right for my stomach.






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Comments by other Members



laurafraser at 23:05 on 12 December 2004  Report this post
i love the rhyme and 'beat' of this-the bits in the brackets offer an alternative tempo which is both charming and serves like a second voice of sorts
a great piece, there is a 'sweetness' of sorts to it-going to come back to this and re-read but like a lot!
xlaura

joanie at 23:06 on 12 December 2004  Report this post
Thanks laura! I appreciate it.

joanie

roovacrag at 15:52 on 14 December 2004  Report this post
Joan..Mill ponds draw such poems. You saw..you captured...you wrote the poem.

Well done.

xx Alice


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