Idea 1.

“ Life sucks”.

Don’t get me wrong there have been some points in my life where I’ve been really happy, but the lows definitely outweigh the highs sometimes and so I have come to the conclusion that life sucks.

Actually I’ve known this for a long time, right from the word ‘go’ when Mother Nature inflicted the horror that is puberty upon me. I mean seriously, how are periods good for you at thirteen? They should start when you’re about twenty-five or even better, later. I certainly wasn’t planning on having kids when I was still one myself. What was my God thinking? Anyway, I’ve plenty to talk to him about if and when I get up there. My biggest question will be why, and him supposedly being a man (they wish) then no doubt his answer will be “why not”.

It’s not just me, my best friend Jiz is pretty much fed up with life and its constant cycle of crap, that life throws at him too. So it’s nice to find someone I can wallow in self-pity with too. Hence why he’s my best mate.

It was an odd sort of way we met. It was one of those typical miserable (obviously) Monday mornings in December. I’d managed to get a lot of my Christmas shopping done over the weekend and was on a high for once. In fact most of my shopping was done and it was only the beginning of December, a real plus when you live in London, as every other bugger has only just started trudging round the shops then. So anyway I’m walking to work, I’m just about to cross the road and some idiot pushes me, and not just any old ‘I’m a rude fucker, get out of my way’ push, this was a real hard shove, and I end up on my arse in front of everyone. It’s London though; no one cares what happens to you they’re all too busy and too self important to care about anyone else and so luckily me showing off my bright pink knickers in the middle of Oxford street went pretty much unnoticed, or so I thought.
“That’s a nice pair of knickers you got there. Want a hand up?” came a voice from amidst the crowd.
I finally managed to regain myself and took a hold of the extended hand in front of me. When I eventually got to my feet I took a look at my helper. Tall, blond, unshaved, but quite handsome still, and the most gorgeous brown eyes I’ve ever seen. The voice certainly did not fit the look.
“Thanks” I finally managed to say, “I don’t know what happened there, someone just shoved me right over.”
“You’ve been robbed, I saw two kids push you over. Simple as that really.”
I quickly checked everything. I still had my bag; I’d put the strap over my head safely, because strangely enough I don’t trust most people in London. Nothing seemed to be missing.
“No I haven’t, nothings missing.” I said still frisking myself.
“Didn’t you have a necklace on just a minute ago?”
“Yes, but it’s…” I trailed off as my hand run over my empty neck. My necklace, my new bloody necklace. I’d managed to get it on sale in one of the more expensive jewelers. How did it break so easily? That guy had told me it was one of there finest makes. More importantly how did this guy notice it missing?
“How did you know it was missing?” I said looking more closely at him. He was a bit scruffy now I got a better look at him. Then it struck me. “Oh my god, you organized it didn’t you. I’ll bet your bloody Fagan to those little shits. I’m gonna call the police.”
“I’d calm down if I were you, I never organized nothing. I see you walking to work everyday that’s all. I notice little things like that. Pretty things on pretty girls. Very eye catching.”
I blushed, then realized what he’d said. Hang on a minute, I thought, don’t let him worm his way out of this just ignore the compliment, he’s been watching you. “You freak. Do you mean you’ve been watching me?” I shuddered inwardly. “Who the hell are you? I’d stay away from me if I were you, I know people, people who could cut off your nuts and other horrible things. So I’d leave me alone if I were you, because I know people.”
I turned and walked away, only to hear from the crowds behind me “So do I.”
Creep.
I didn’t exactly rush to work, but I got there quicker than usual. What a complete loser.