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WAKE UP
Posted: 05 November 2004
Word Count: 97
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I wake up at the crack of dawn
stir and stretch with a final yawn,
snuggle down between the sheets
two more minutes before moving my feet.
Another yawn,stretch and scratch,
fingers through hair that looks like a thatch,
run downstairs kettle on
not looking in a mirror,no need for that one.
Tongue like fur,throat just rough
morning cuppa soothes enough.
Showered and dressed
most impressed.
Slap on makeup to cover the cracks
even erased those tiny eye bags
ready to take the world we know
I don't care if they're friend or foe.
I AM AWAKE.
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Comments by other Members
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 poemsgalore at 18:18 on 05 November 2004
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Hi Alice, I enjoyed this, as I don't put in much of an effort in the morning, although I can relate to the | fingers through hair that looks like a thatch, |
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I can't run downstairs anymore, more like a crab sidling (hip and knee probs) but oh how I remember the days when I could.
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roovacrag at 18:58 on 05 November 2004
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Kathleen.. I know what you mean. Glad you liked it and I will change my bedroom clock. Still getting up at 5'30 instead of 6'30. Why I don't know as I have retired.
Still don't have mirrors,as I look a sight before my cuppa.
many thanks
xxxxxxxxxx Alice joy
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Ticonderoga at 15:09 on 06 November 2004
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very evocative, and laced with your usual gentle, self-deprecating humour.
Best,
Mike
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roovacrag at 20:28 on 06 November 2004
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Mike..... thanks for the comments.
We all know the feeling of waking up.
xxxx Alice
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The Walrus at 09:18 on 07 November 2004
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Amusing poem Stan, made me think that no matter what happens during the day, our waking/getting up routine tends to be the same.
Red
xxx
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roovacrag at 11:36 on 07 November 2004
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Red..being a morning person like you, takes a cuppa and sometimes a couple of asprin to jolt the starting gear.
Many thanks.
xxxxx Red mum
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TheGodfather at 14:21 on 08 November 2004
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Alice,
An original piece/idea. Strange that I've never read anything about this topic before. It's odd that life works out that way. That's what poetry is for I guess, to point out the mundane that we don't think about. What's going on with the XXX underlined links going to porn search sites? That's strange. There is even a link in your poem. I'm sure you didn't make them. They show up in my Writewords page too. Weird.
TheGodfather
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Lawrenco at 15:58 on 08 November 2004
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Very good and I must agree with The Godfather that I surprised I havent come across a poem with this subject but a real hoot well done.
I could almost feel the colkd as your run to get a cuppa.
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roovacrag at 17:54 on 08 November 2004
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Goddy..I write how I feel at the moment.
This is me first thing in the morning,even the dog doesn't get too close.
I never have a pattern in writing,I just do it and have done for more years than you have lived.;)).
It is when I have to write about the ones I love and who are close I get a problem.
Trying to do do one on Miffle and it's hard.
xx Alice
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roovacrag at 17:57 on 08 November 2004
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Lawrenco I am dead till I get my first taste of Ringtons tea.
Anyone who lives up in Newcastle will know what I mean as thats where it comes from.
xx Alice
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Don Gorgon at 22:01 on 08 November 2004
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Nice one roovacrag! It's so easy to relate to this poem, it's me every day, apart from the make up bit (that's just weekends). I have a brew left outside me bedroom door every morning and I always ask,'has it a cape on?', as in, 'is it a super brew?', because the first one of the day has to be a 'super brew'. Great works, really enjoyed it!
Thanks
Don
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miffle at 13:59 on 09 November 2004
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Alice, enjoyed the poem :-) Made me think of bears with all those wonderfully physical references to scratching and stretching and yawning and snuggling and, of course, fur! But then we humans can incline towards bear behaviour especially during the winter months when really I'd favour a spot of hibernation given the cold.. how about you? A moot poem to post I thought for the colder months OR perhaps you wake up similarly all year round? Love nikki xx
NB a few more technical thoughts:
* perhaps you could lose some of the little words and still keep the sense whist strengthening the rhythm (?) for example...
'two more minutes, move my feet' (?)
'fingers through my hair like thatch' (?)
* Perhaps third verse last two lines could be lengthened (?)
* Loved attitude at the end. Do you need the last line?
<Added>
Nb continuing the bear theme... Early morning, growling time for me! Beware!
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