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RLG 11 - Diversity
Posted: 02 November 2004 Word Count: 90 Summary: My attempt
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For a big man, my brother had exceptionally small toes.
As a woman, I have often tried to denigrate all those
who appear to me quite different, I suppose.
Though a child, my daughter had the air of one who knows
that everyone has oddities for others to expose.
For a small world - and it’s changing as I’m speaking, as it grows,
There will always be the ones who have the high times and the lows.
For a big man, my uncle had a very tiny nose………..
SO WHAT?
Comments by other Members
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James Anthony at 18:56 on 02 November 2004
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Excellent! I really enjoyed that. THe line is lending itself to poetry a lot I see.
It really ticks along and it's like your not reading it, almost feels like an easy thought as i was reading it.
Enjoyed it loads
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joanie at 19:17 on 02 November 2004
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Thanks James. Very much appreciated. I don't know about lending itself to poetry - I usually write poetry anyway!
I am very interested to know that you think it 'ticks along'. I like my poetry to be like that, if possible.
Glad you liked it.
joanie
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Jumbo at 19:23 on 02 November 2004
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joanie
I liked the repeated form of this - and the coming back to the same rhyme at the end of each three lines.
Very clever!
All the best
jumbo
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Account Closed at 19:41 on 02 November 2004
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Joanie,
i liked the conclusion! It's amazing how this line is flexible. Lovely rhythm - it flows naturally.
Elspeth
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joanie at 19:45 on 02 November 2004
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Thank you Elspeth. I really do appreciate your response (at the risk of being very repetitive)!
joanie
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bjlangley at 09:39 on 03 November 2004
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Joanie, I like this. Impressed that you managed to use so many words rhyming with toes without it ever coming across as being forced.
All the best,
Ben
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Okkervil at 15:39 on 03 November 2004
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Heheh, great. Keeps up momentum brilliantly (and all those rhyming words too! Well done, you). It's just great, actually. One of the best things I've read all week, and I've been browsing the sleeve-notes of Roxy Music albums.
Bye!
James
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olebut at 17:11 on 03 November 2004
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Joanie Ha ha you made me laugh which today I needed thank you was your uncle related to The Pobble
take care
david x
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SamMorris at 22:39 on 03 November 2004
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Joanie, I thought this worked brilliantly! I liked the way that this had a light and easy surface, but something more underneath (if that makes any sense at all!)
Regards
Sam
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joanie at 06:49 on 04 November 2004
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Ben, James, David, Christina, Sam..... Thank you all for your kind comments.
Sam - that makes perfect sense!
Glad you liked it.
joanie
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