I walk into the house,
Closing the door behind me,
Closing my freedom behind me.

I am quiet - I want no one to wake,
She is sitting there
Silently on the stair

'Hello' I say, silent praying
Wanting for no hurt or slagging
Silence and solitude I crave

She erupts into me
I feel like dropping to the ground
As though hit by a million rounds

I feel small, hurt with no self esteem
Unloved, unwanted and undesired
I crave for the day again, of her loving touch

Into the early morning we go,
Attack after attack on my senses and mind
My eyelids heavy with tears and unhappiness

Eventually it stops, no more questions
I feel stupid, numb and out of place
Silently she walks upstairs, and answers to sleep


I crawl into bed
The warmth wraps itself around me
Gently and silently pulling me in
Snugness, warmness and my dreams of content ness

Cosyness, solitude a place of my own
Dreams start kicking in
Freedom again