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It`s my life
Posted: 11 August 2004
Word Count: 61
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As the torrent of bile
rains down on my head
I try to remember
love and respect,
those pallbearers
of familial love,
apparently.
Premature judgements
ejaculate
from your lips,
poisoning my cursed existence
in misplaced tones
of purplish hue.
Cutting me down
to my shivering core,
you clutch
your comfort blanket,
soaked in tears of resignation
cried by tired red eyes.
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Comments by other Members
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 The Walrus at 20:25 on 11 August 2004
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Shards of glass piece Bobo. Nobody does this better than you. I like the vaguely contemptuous tone of the first stanza, as for:
Premature judgements
ejaculate
from your lips,
...babe I had to laugh... I know this is supposed to be a 'serious' poem but cool rearrangement of words!
The Walrus
x
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Bobo at 21:07 on 11 August 2004
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Cheers Walrus - no worries re laughing at my 'premature ejaculation'...it made me smile also, and I wrote it! It's actually about my mother and her knack for condemning me and the way I live my life...so you're right re the 'shards of glass' comment! Families, eh?!
BoBo x
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 Elsie at 23:02 on 11 August 2004
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Oh Bobo. Mothers, fathers - was just thinking about this subject myself. Luckily I get off lighty with mine. I also liked the 2nd stanza especially.
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olebut at 08:54 on 12 August 2004
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Bobo powerful piece with a degree of venom me thinks, however well expressed and some good phrasiology I guess 'premature judgements ejaculating' will be the phrase which most seize on but it is the last verse which hits me the most.
How sad that sometimes our parents react in such ways when we don't grow up to be either a mirror image of them or the person that exists in their image of how they think we should be.
I was lucky my parents let me grow into the person I am, just a pity I did not grow to be more like both of them but perhaps that comes with age and reflection, nor appreciate too late much of what they especially my mother tried to teach me, especially about arts and heritage, but then that is sadly the price of being young and the realisation the pay back is when you get older.
sorry I have gone off on one but a powerful poem and as has been said its something at which you seem to excell
take care
davidx
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Bobo at 17:38 on 12 August 2004
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Thanks for your comments David. Seeing as it's my private life which my mother seems to so disapprove of, I tried to lace the piece with sexual connotation - the 'premature judgements ejaculating' being rather obvious, but there are other references also.
We can only ever be ourselves...
BoBo x
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olebut at 21:50 on 12 August 2004
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bobo yes you are right we can only be ourselves such a pity so many others don't realise that and spend their lives trying to be somebody else
take care
david x
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