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Insomnia

by libera 

Posted: 10 August 2004
Word Count: 62
Summary: Something many writers may suffer from!


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When all the world is sound asleep
All your thoughts and fears run deep.
You see restless nights and wide-awake days;
Every detail is drawn out, everything delays.

Time goes on forever, your body does not pause;
You’re sleepless, yet tired, you don’t know the cause.
The days are long, and the nights, like marathons;
And sheer frustration strangles you like pythons.






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Comments by other Members



The Walrus at 20:36 on 10 August 2004  Report this post
I don't actually suffer from insomnia, but related to this because I likened it to POSMS (Perpetual Over Stimulated Mind Syndrome - new term which I've just invented). Captures the frustration of not being able to switch off. Good to read a piece like this to realise there are others out there (god help me WW is a vehicle for therapy ;-)

The Walrus

roovacrag at 22:03 on 10 August 2004  Report this post
Libera.. know the feeling. I am often up at 4 even 5 in a morning.

Makes a long day.

Especially when its dark and wet.

Ok in summer when you can go out, but for the rest of the year its drab.

Good one.

xxAlice

Jumbo at 23:53 on 10 August 2004  Report this post
libera

I'm with you all the way here -

You’re sleepless, yet tired, you don’t know the cause.

That's so true!!


You've caught the frustration of not being able to sleep so well!Perhaps as The Walrus has suggested - welcome to the WW Therapy Room!

Regards

jumbo

olebut at 08:41 on 11 August 2004  Report this post
liberia good sentiments i never suffer form insomnia in fact hea dhits pillow gone, must be a clear conscience


take care

david



<Added>

I have revisited this poem because I am troubled by the last line but understand the image you are trying to create I ma equally not sure my suggetsion works any better although I think starting the line with sheer is more effective.

I have also taken the liberty of making a few other minor changes which I feel make the poem scan better but they are only my suggestions and I offer them more as somethings for you to think about.


When all the world is sound asleep
all your thoughts and fears run deep,
you see restless nights, wide-awake days;
Every detail is drawn out, everything delays.

Time goes on forever, your body does not pause;
You’re sleepless, yet tired, but do not know the cause.
The days are long, the nights, like endless marathons;
sheer frustration strangles you, like reticulated pythons.




hope you don't mind the suggestions ignore them if you will

take care david


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