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Keepsake
Posted: 05 August 2004 Word Count: 60
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I shall keep it for your sake not for the sake of it.
Not an ancient relic of our love but a treasure to relish.
A true remembrance not a tacky souvenir.
I keep it for your sake.
My memory of you, not some memento which I cling to for the sake of it.
I kept it for your sake.
Comments by other Members
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olebut at 08:00 on 05 August 2004
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Joanie seemingly simple but in reality quite a complex piece and equally very effecitive. I stumbled a few times over the word rememberance and wondered if it should be either memento or memory but after a few reads think it works OK
take care
david
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Nell at 08:19 on 05 August 2004
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Joanie, an interesting and unusual piece, as David says, more complex than it seems at first. It would be interesting to take a word and experiment with its meaning in this way - I can't remember having seen that done before. The only thing that made me wonder about this was if the second couplet contradicted the first:
I shall keep it for your sake/not for the sake of it. This says to me that it doesn't matter how intrinsically precious or beautiful the object is, it is being kept because of the memories of the loved one that it evokes.
Not an ancient relic of our love/but a treasure to relish. It seems here that the object is being kept to enjoy for its own worth.
It's possible of course that I'm reading these lines in a different way from the one intended; in any case this is a thought-provoking piece, and one to return to.
Nell.
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joanie at 09:33 on 05 August 2004
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David, thank you for your comments. I'm glad you found it effective.
I was looking for a word other than memory or memento as I use them later in the poem, but also as the opposite of a souvenir, something with a much deeper significance.
Thanks again.
joanie
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joanie at 09:44 on 05 August 2004
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Nell, thank you for your response.
In the second couplet, I wanted to say that this object has significance now, not just in the past; it has become a treasure because of the memories attached to it.
You made me analyse much more deeply - thank you!
Yes, I am interested in looking at a word and its different meanings and usages. By the time I had finished this, 'sake' had ceased to have any meaning because I had said it so often.
Perhaps a cup of sake is needed now!
joanie
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The Walrus at 07:44 on 06 August 2004
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Beautiful, gentle piece Joanie. I particularly like the fact that you don't say what the keepsake is and the reader is left to imagine.
The Walrus
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