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Getting the balance right
Posted: 24 July 2004
Word Count: 107
Summary: Because I have such admiration for those who can - both physically and metaphorically.
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She pauses...
left foot held high
knee bent
arms aloft.
one second... two...
and she throws herself to the ground,
shooting splayed legs skywards,
supported on skinny arms
made strong by the confidence
and vigour of youth.
A perfect circle.
A few skips then again
a quick twirl then again
a shriek of ecstacy then again.
Turning cartwheels
in the face of the world.
Version II ...
She pauses...
left foot held high
knee bent
arms aloft.
one second... two...
A perfect circle.
A few skips then again
a quick twirl then again
a shriek of ecstacy then again.
Turning cartwheels
in the face of the world.
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Comments by other Members
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 olebut at 09:41 on 25 July 2004
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Joanie
good image sof the gymnast or perhpas a a young woman with confidence in her own ability to skip through life with ease.
poetry is about observation in many forms
take care
david
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The Walrus at 13:07 on 25 July 2004
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Grace in movement is a wonderful thing - saw a Cuban ballet yesterday and was spellbound by their confidence, their grace and passion. A wonderful piece Joanie. Particularly loved the last two lines.
The Walrus
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 joanie at 13:53 on 25 July 2004
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David and The Walrus, thanks for your comments.
David, the image in my mind was rather of a little girl in the playground/field, oblivious to the world and its troubles, just revelling in life.
The Walrus, glad you liked the last two lines; that was the crux - the joy and abandon despite the madness of the world.
joanie
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roovacrag at 14:52 on 25 July 2004
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Joan,lovely poem.often seen children doing cartwheels in the park. So carefree.
Well done.
xx Alice
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joanie at 17:36 on 25 July 2004
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Thank you Alice! I have never turned a cartwheel. Have you?!
Joan
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roovacrag at 20:02 on 25 July 2004
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Joan spent a lot of my childhood doing them. Most people recognised the knickers. Happy days.
xx Alice
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Fearless at 20:14 on 25 July 2004
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Joanie
Equilibrium, focus, expression, freedom and defiance all come through in this piece. The World has always been a dangerous place, being cyclical by generation, but it also continues to be magical, forever rewarding inquisitiveness, gentleness and innocence.
Fearless
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joanie at 21:16 on 25 July 2004
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Fearless, thank you for your observations. You have understood exactly what I wanted to say. Thanks!
joanie
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lieslj at 20:56 on 04 September 2004
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Hi Joanie,
You've captured the brilliant gravity-defying nature of these astonishing artists in your poem. My sense is that these lines don't quite have the levity or charm that the rest of the poem has;
and she throws herself to the ground,
shooting splayed legs skywards,
supported on skinny arms
made strong by the confidence
and vigour of youth.
I'm not sure how to - or if you want to - change them. I just had a sense of the other lines succeed in matching the artistry of the gymnasts in a powerful way.
I wonder what other folk think. If anyone else says the same thing, then perhaps it would be worth pondering this observation of mine.
Warm regards
Liesl
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joanie at 21:53 on 04 September 2004
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Liesl, thank you for your comments. I think that your observation underlines my thoughts which underpin this. My starting point was the idea of the world going mad in so many ways, and the image of a young girl turning cartwheels in carefree abandon, despite whatever is happening 'out there'.
I don't know if that makes sense.
Thanks for reading!
joanie
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lieslj at 21:55 on 04 September 2004
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I think this poem could stand without those four lines. I really do. Glad my observations confirmed something for you.
Liesl
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lieslj at 21:56 on 04 September 2004
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Not four, five. Duh! Too late to be trying to make sense in a public forum... should go to bed now!
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joanie at 22:11 on 04 September 2004
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Liesl, yes, I do see what you mean! Thanks. I'll put both on and see how they look.
joanie
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