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cup of death

by irish_trea 

Posted: 25 June 2004
Word Count: 119


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CUP OF DEATH

Clenched hands together till knuckles bore
knees raw and red from earth rough floor
head bowed so low as a beggar's plead
I wondered whom to his words would heed
pain and sorrow gloomed his face
as he begged for mercy and change of fate
Then within a moment of humbled prayer
came a whispering voice out of nowhere
Behold my son so full of grace
I know the woe's of human race
A blood red tear escaped his eye
as a vision showed he should die
greeting goodbye the evening sun
he summons the words thy will be done
soon I'll lay my work to rest
as I drink for them, the cup of death.






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Comments by other Members



anisoara at 15:50 on 26 June 2004  Report this post
Irish Trea,

This is the crucifixion, then?

I notice that you use language creatively.

"low as a beggar's plead"
"gloomed his face"

Nice.

I noticed a mistake here: "woe's" should be "woes"

Thanks!

Ani



roovacrag at 20:24 on 26 June 2004  Report this post
Irish,welcome to WW.
Very well written and a joy to read.
Each word carefully done.
Well done.
xx Alice

paul53 [for I am he] at 09:24 on 03 March 2005  Report this post
I enjoyed this very much. Many a fine turn of phrase.


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