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Beautiful Blue Eyes

by Rai15 

Posted: 12 June 2004
Word Count: 323
Summary: This follows on from my other poem; Whispers of a Mind, and there'll probably be more that follow on.
Related Works: Cary • Whispers of a Mind • 

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I send my love to her,
that angel from another world;
she must be so terrified,
of the media, the press,
the police and the scientists.
She’s not of our world,
but somewhere man evolved,
when she woke up there,
she had wings and freedom, but
when she woke up here,
she had coroners and flash photography.

Her body is not like ours inside,
that is why I thought she was dead,
when I found her on that hill.
I suppose it was a type of hibernation
she was in, I couldn’t sense her breathing.
I didn’t know what to do,
neither did the paramedics
and the coroner was twice as shocked.
Photographs were being taken, as they
pulled back her eyelid and shone a torch
in her eye, they were the brightest blue
I’d ever seen, but then they focussed and
grew wide with fear.

Like a cat she sprung up to her feet
and backed away, blinded by the cameras,
her eyes darted around, I could sense
her breathing now; shallow and sharp.
She turned and ran, toward the tree line,
running on the balls of her bare feet,
her muscles absorbing every impact.
The photographers began to chase her;
the coroner was frozen with shock,
I stood and watched her, running for her life.
But as she ran, she bent her knees, as if to crouch,
her wings instantly spread open, and fleetingly
all was silent. There was only her.

She pushed off from her position, thrusting herself
into the air. She climbed above the trees,
and paused momentarily, eclipsing the sun.
She looked down at those who pursued her still,
as a tear rolled down my cheek, I felt her eyes
lock on mine. Then she swooped down
over the treetops, smoothly, beautifully.
She flew to my left, along the tree line,
then turning right she climbed a bit, and gracefully
disappeared over the other side of the hill.






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Comments by other Members



roovacrag at 12:09 on 13 June 2004  Report this post
Rai, very good poem. Well written and so full power.
Have you ever thought it as a story rather than poems?
Think about it my friend.
Well done.
xx Alice

miffle at 13:12 on 13 June 2004  Report this post
Rai, enjoyed your poem... The poem seems different from many of your others: not as raw, perhaps a bit more distanced from yourself (?). Every piece of artwork is a 'Portrait of the Artist' of course, but I do think that sometimes poems can be all the more powerful for being less direct (?) i.e. I had the sense of an imagination in flight here and of something not necessarily true in 'fact'... (?). I like this new tack very much. This piece is controlled and confident. Look forward to reading more, Miffle :-)

<Added>

Following on from Alice's thought re. stories: yes, you could experiment with that but I do see it as a 'narrative poem' and I feel it works as it stands.

Nell at 15:28 on 13 June 2004  Report this post
Rai, this is so beautiful, so moving, it may not be true but it certainly feels true - is that because beauty=truth=beauty? I don't know, but I just LOVE this, your imagination, the way you've told the story, the strangeness and everything about it. I think this is very special indeed. Heavenly.

Nell.

Rai15 at 09:08 on 14 June 2004  Report this post
Thank you all very much.
I did consider writing this in a story, but when I went to start writing it came out as poetry. I might try a story version sometime after June, as June is very hectic at the moment, but it'll probably be a short story.
I'm very happy that you all like it, as I've had this idea brewing in the back of my head for well over a year now.

Thanks again,

-Rai-

miffle at 10:09 on 14 June 2004  Report this post
Rai, yes I think this poem + 'Whispers of a Mind' are very special pieces. I would say polish them up and send them out as a pair to the small press magazines :-) Good luck with that, Miffle


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