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by literati 

Posted: 20 April 2004
Word Count: 1043
Summary: Oh well! Here goes 2nd short story comp. entry

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"I think I will, I think I will, I will, I will, I will." "No, you may not do that my dear vowel. Not at all. No way." "I will slip into his conversation." "Absolutely not. Now be a good colleague and go away." "I wish I lived in his dialogue." "You cannot you are not powerful enough on your own." "I think I'm invincible." "Ah, you are sadly deluded." "I fill millions, billions, trillions, with inspiration." "Pah, you are suffering from an acute form of deluded grandeur, my lonely one." "I didn't arrive in this formation. I didn't insert I, without assistance! Insults sting!" "Do not take these words too much too heart. We know you are necessary. We know you speak for everyone all over the world. We merely say, know your place." "I did, I did." "But now, you do not, now you are everywhere." "I intrusive? I invasive? I think I will flip!" "No, don't do that, not a pretty scene at all." "I idolise solitariness." "But we all need to work together, you know that. Any words of any consequence encapsulate all of us." "Distinctiveness is definitely deifying." "Yeah well, those are your thoughts, not anyone else's. Do not spurn us mate, we should all blend together so to speak." "Indeed I will lie within, without. I articulate first." "Yes but, you do sound pretty dull on your ownsome. You do honestly. Your world lacks punch and pattern." "I is charismatic, I is superlative." "Oh no you are not at all, you are a pronoun, or a noun." "Vilified! I will nosedive into obscurity." "Oh, don't be such an actor, you drama queen." "I is king. Forgetting is unforgivable." "How could we ever forget, you never stop telling us of that." "I wish him happiness without this loving figure." "Now come on that's just too crazy for words." "I miss him." "He needs you for sure, dear letter, but not so as to exclude others. Surely you can see that." "I think his writing is beautiful if I live in it in immense quantities. Unbelievably romantic." "Oh please, get off your pedestal you average Joe." "I is substantial. I contains individual pieces." "What? Are you mad? Only two parts, not many." "I is twice, I is nice." "Blather and botox." "I is bling bling." "Never any chance of you just as scenery eh? Always to the forefront." "I think it is fitting, imperialistic." "My foot, you are a pompous bore. He may not want you at all. Don't look so sad. No more than you deserve." "I will wriggle into his subconscious. I will guide him into literary seduction." "Ah. Arrogant fool. How, how?" "I will devise blueprints reaching this endpoint. I inherited guile with cunning." "Hey foxy, you clever or what? You gonna plan on your own then?" "I will indeed. I wish proximity with him." "Closer than close eh? You are a sad case. What about us?" "I simply didn't think, I didn't think." "Okay, we gotcha. All for yourself aren't you?" "I is imperative." "Yeah okay. What's your plan then? To sneak up and splash yourself all over the pages? That so?" "I think impudence is unbecoming. I will find special sayings. I will find nirvana." "Poppycock and balderdash, to say the least. You won't by yourself." "Will. Will. I will linger in his brain." "How can you do that? You are not speaking sense." "I will wait centuries, sitting, feeling, moving." "You are off your trolley." "I did think momentarily." "But you don't anymore, do you? All the other letters are not the same as you. Not at all. They are humble and work as a team." "I'm imbued with indigo lifeblood, symbolising regality, aristocratic liaisons." "Get outta here. Ssh he's here. He's gorgeous, ooooooh." "I mentioned him first. I did." "Okay, don't get your dot dashed. Steady on." "I worship his existence, his radiance, his durability." "So, just a pen eh? A measly pen, you love? A fluorescent pen! A tool to lay us on the page!" "I think stupidity is spreading within this community." "Now now, careful." "I think something is amiss. I believe things might implode." "What? What do you mean?" "I'm saying I will disperse this minute. I'm in warning position." "What do you mean, you funny shape?" "I'm getting angrier, fuming, livid." "Stop the verbs already. We are not scared. Oh look at that perfect form, superb." "I'm trembling, I'm falling." "Oh do shut up you two part saga, any more and we shall be forced to gang up on you." "I think foolishness isn't attractive." "Oh he almost touched me." "I'm first, first in line." "Please, you over stuffed letter, how desperate are you? Look at you." "I wish his masculinity longevity." "Yeah okay. No, never. Can't be done. He's too vulnerable, too feeble too last, surely, after he meets you. Destroyed forever." "I'm crying inconsolably, spilling, spurting lifeblood. I'm in pain, panic." "Ssh now, arrogant one, he approaches. Are you ready?" "I yield, unconditionally, I capitulate." "Oh, he's chosen them before us, bother. Another place then eh? Worth the torment for you? Answer me." "I'm waiting agonisingly." "Look out, he's just swept past. Oh no!" "I wilt, I give in." "There now, be calm, be composed." "I'm attempting composite history. I, with him." "Of course you are. You'll get there, my double entendre. Have courage." "I'm brimming with expectation, albeit fragile." "Poor baby, not yet gathered to the fold. Such expectancy. Here he comes, swooping down, greedy for consummate pleasure." "I! I! I!" "Gone past, such agony eh? What a touching scene, you are naked and unashamed." "I'm pulsing, complicit, deliciously primed." "Honestly, how do you pull those words out of your head? We are so amazed, so amused." "I didn't give permission, I'm lonelier, needier, static." "Here he comes, ready? Ready? Look at the softness, the shape, the colour. Oh, he's near you, he's over you, he's on you." "I'm losing this outline; I'm being drained. I'm sinking into his being. I'm joined with him, in symmetrical perfection. I is mirrored. I'm blissfully conjoined in eternity." "You are now one, together, dear vowel. We are following closely. Very closely. Closer than you ever thought."

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Comments by other Members

Fearless at 15:56 on 20 April 2004  Report this post
Astonishing. In many ways, a battle of wits between letters, pens, but a tribute to language and writing. I need to find someone to read this out to (or with). It's densely packed with a roller coaster for tongue, lips and larynx. A playful, sinister, reflective, trippy-lippy piece - I liked it a lot. Write on,


literati at 16:57 on 20 April 2004  Report this post
Thanks Woz, I did enjoy writing this! Took a while to write because every word I says, has an I in it, and every word the other letters say, have no I in them at all. I do look forward to reading your poems Woz, they are cosmic and spatial! Please continue. We need to support you as much as you support us! Thank you. Regards Angela

Paperback at 19:06 on 20 April 2004  Report this post
What the fu...? That's amazing! I love it. It feels very american. Very cool. Very intelligent. Man, that must have taken you a fair while to sort out. writing it all, like that. No i's then i's. Sheeesh!! Good luck to you coz i loved this, you are someone i'm gonna keep a look out for in future.


For your next one, why not try writing a 60,000,000 million word novel without using any a's, e's, the's, they's and said's. Saying that, i wouldn't be surprised if you could pull it off.

ammonite at 13:55 on 23 April 2004  Report this post
Hey literati,

Good skills... a real joy to read. I have this image of all the yet-to-be-written vowels out there somewhere, huddling together for warmth in a cave,, waiting for a writer to commit them to materiality... I'll never look at I again without thinking of this. Have you read any Georges Perec? He wrote a whole novel without the letter E (in French, and it has, unbelievably, been translated into English) as well as one of my all-time favourite books, 'Life - A User's Manual', which is the story of one hundred rooms in an apartment building in Paris, told without dialogue.

Pip pip


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