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Glimpsed Perfection.
Posted: 10 March 2004
Word Count: 55
Summary: This is based on an experience that lifted my heart and soul... they say that the eyes are the windows to the soul, and this this is how I felt, feeling such a connection whilst looking into someones eyes.
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My body, heart and soul
Could dance upon the shore,
In a haze of innocence
At dawn forever more.
And there, as in a dream,
My feet would steal away
The rhythm of the night
And make it stay,
For I would long to be
Entranced forever there,
Dancing through a dream
Without a care.
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Comments by other Members
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 roovacrag at 15:09 on 10 March 2004
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Welcome to WW.
Eyes are the windows to the soul,like mirror image.
Very good,flows well and rolls off the tongue easily.
If this is your first sample i hope you become a full member so we can read more.
Well done.
xx Alice
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poemsgalore at 18:33 on 10 March 2004
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Hi, loved your poem, I enjoyed the way it flowed, just like the ebbing and flowing of the tide on the shore.
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Chem at 20:11 on 10 March 2004
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Welcome to WW. Hope you become a full member, it's definitely worthwhile!
I really enjoyed this poem. Would love to see more.
Em
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The Walrus at 11:59 on 11 March 2004
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Ditto above comments. Dreamlike, lyrical. Can almost see the beatific smile.
Good piece.
The Walrus
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Fearless at 13:29 on 11 March 2004
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Captivated...entranced...a spark, connection dedicated.....excellent poem. Can't add anything to the other comments. Look forward to reading more of your lyrics.
fearless
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igbit33 at 23:51 on 12 March 2004
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I think this is absolutely beautiful. Welcome to WW, Epona Love.
Iggy. xx
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paul53 [for I am he] at 17:29 on 28 February 2005
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Had more time to look through your uploaded work. Very impressed by some [Clouds & Glimpsed Perfection stand out]. Good choice of words, minimal punctuation, good spelling.
Next poem you write, set it aside for a day or so, then go back to it and read it aloud to yourself. Every time something makes you pause or even slightly interrupts the flow, mark it for later revision. Poems must flow unimpeded; that way they sink straight into the listener's ear.
Sorry if this sounds flowery, but getting stuff read is a one-shot deal - the reader absorbs it or passes on. Yours has great potential.
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