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Family Portrait
Posted: 14 February 2021 Word Count: 141 Summary: Had a chat on FaceTime with my brother today. Every now and then it hits me in a flash, how much he looks like my dad!
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Version 2
We are frozen in childhood summers. Your face a flicker book of memories, features blurred by love and time. The sound of strumming chords from the bedroom next to mine. “Stairway to Heaven” still makes me feel safe. My only Man of the house. You were my benchmark when boys were cruel and fathers were gone. But now when I look closely, in pixels of truth our father looks back. Does our mother look back at you?
Version 1
We are frozen in childhood summers. Your face a flicker book of memories, features blurred by love and time.
I see leather, motor bikes. Strumming chords in your bedroom. “Stairway to Heaven” still makes me feel safe.
But now when I look closely in pixels of truth my father looks back. Smiling. Does our mother look back at you?
Comments by other Members
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V`yonne at 11:03 on 15 February 2021
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We are frozen<br />
in childhood summers.<br />
<br />
is an immediate hook Jo-Ann. Not a transormation but something seemingly immutable! And then the filmic, childhood flicker book. A face still animated in a screen of today. That is so very clever of you. Past technologies meet the future here. Everything has changed and yet nothing has changed in that relationship. I know this so well from talking to my sister.<br />
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Your face<br />
a flicker book<br />
of memories,<br />
<br />
is beautiful and<br />
<br />
features blurred<br />
by love and time.<br />
<br />
is so poignant. I love the way you express the passage of time and the etching of experience upon his face. And the family connection strengthens with<br />
<br />
when I look closely<br />
in pixels of truth<br />
my father looks back.<br />
<br />
Pixels of truth? WOW! Pixels are of course on the screen but they are also tiny particles, tiny particles that make up years of truth. Le bon mot! BRAVA!<br />
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I like the question at the end. It usggests that even this is a memory shared experience, a mutual recognition and a memory laid down. And of course the answer is probably yes.<br />
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I think this is a tremendous poem and a very personal insight and it hits the brief perfectly. It tranforms technolgies and family and your brother and yourself and the future. I';ll maybe see it in BwS or Gyroscope Review or somewhere?<br />
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michwo at 11:32 on 15 February 2021
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I';m just as impressed as Oonah with "Family Portrait", Jo-Ann.<br />
A simple but profound poem. Well done.
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crowspark at 09:45 on 16 February 2021
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Brilliant poem, and a worthy winner!<br />
When I lived in Manchester I visited the uni. They were inviting close relatives to an experiment. Each person sat opposite each other in a booth looking through a screen. By altering the light levels you could either see your own reflection or the face of your sibling. At the mid-point setting you could see a composite of both faces and it vey much worked in line with your poem. I didn';t have a sibling handy although 2 of my sisters look very much like my father! I don';t much.
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Border Girl at 15:51 on 16 February 2021
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I enjoyed this very much and it is so true! As I have reached a certain age, I can confirm that this most certainly does happen and when your mother and father have passed on, it is a joy to see them in your siblings faces.
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V`yonne at 13:49 on 23 February 2021
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I think this might do, Jo-Ann. Family Connections might be a good title instead of Portrait but not sure... As ever -- advice only.
We seem frozen
in childhood summers.
Your face
a flicker book
of memories,
features blurred
by love and time.
I see you in leather,
on motor bikes.
Hear you strumming
“Stairway to Heaven”
in the bedroom next to mine.
Made me feel safe.
Man of the house,
you were
my benchmark
when boys were cruel
and father gone.
Now
on face time
when I look closely
our father looks back
in pixels of truth,
smiling.
Does our mother
look back
at you?
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V`yonne at 14:19 on 23 February 2021
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Another thought is that this poem is very appropriate for Beate Siddrigdaughter's site
writinginawomansvoice@gmail.com,
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Jojovits1 at 18:33 on 23 February 2021
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Thanks so much for looking at this, Oonah.
You've given me some great stuff to work with and I’ll have a bit of a play. I may give Beate a shout actually. It does seem a fit and I don’t want to change it up too much.
Lets see. Thanks again for helping me out of the “poetry panic” :-)
Jo x
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V`yonne at 18:55 on 23 February 2021
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Actually I had another thought about the title Jo-Ann. Maybe instead of adding that line
on face time
That could be the title?!
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