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True Story

by Jojovits1 

Posted: 12 January 2019
Word Count: 139
Summary: When one year disappoints, there's alway the next :-)

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True Story!
I’ve decided to be healthy
so I’ve gone and joined the gym.
I have been there twice already,
working hard on getting thin.
I’ve invested in a sport’s bra
and a Zumba DVD
so I reckon by September
you’ll all see a brand new me!
I have polished all my crystals
to promote my calmer state.
I have started doing yoga
and begun to meditate.
I’m aligning all my chakras
and I’ve smudged to Kingdom come;
I’ve refused all conversations
where my Zen might come undone.
Every New Year is a clean slate
and a chance to fix the past,
though the odds are stacked against us -
resolutions rarely last -
We’ll intend to make the changes
even for the shortest time,
then it’s back to stress and back to fags
and back to drinking wine!

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Comments by other Members

Mickey at 22:58 on 12 January 2019  Report this post
BRILLIANT!!!! Absolutely LOVE it. Happy New Year!

Jojovits1 at 23:25 on 12 January 2019  Report this post
Happy New Year, Mickey!  I was channelling you while writing this. Lol 😁

V`yonne at 23:28 on 12 January 2019  Report this post
Oh damn, you nailed it!!! Been there done all that blush My husband even bought me an agate carnelian egg for Christmas -- a symbol of new beginnings laugh or a tell-tale sign that he's noticed my stress levels under the baggy black jumpers cryingBeen to the nurse who took my blood pressure and expects me back in March with pounds off! Didn't join a gym but my knees are too dodgy for that these days and at 64 I'd just knack myself but as soon as my bathing suit fits....

I love

I’m aligning all my chakras
and I’ve smudged to Kingdom come;
I’ve refused all conversations
where my Zen might come undone

I am allowing myself just enough time on FB these days not to get ANGRY with the world. This is now the official site of the WW Fit for Nothing and Lost for Words Support Group devil
Thanks Jo. I feel less alone now .

Jojovits1 at 23:42 on 12 January 2019  Report this post
Hahaha, Oonah!  Problem is, I do it every flipping year!  

I will work on my spiritual self; I will love my body enough not to poison it with crap...yada, yada...

I do honestly love both the optimism of the New Year, New (same) Goals and giggle slightly when they’ve all gone to pot by March.  Let’s see how long it lasts this year.  I’ll let you know when I’m a size 8 Buddhist 😂.

Thomas Norman at 09:46 on 13 January 2019  Report this post
Hi Jo - This is tremendous, to me it's all a bit tongue-in-cheek. But there's a kind of 'I wish' there too. Though it's a light hearted piece there's also a deeper feeling to it. I suspect you really want to do it but in your heart you know you never can. It's cleverly done and not just a funny!

The poem has a lovely rhythm and some excellent rhymes. There's subtly and inventive writing, a very fine and accomplished poem.


Jojovits1 at 10:22 on 13 January 2019  Report this post
Thanks Thomas.   There is most definitely an "I wish" there 😁.

V`yonne at 16:13 on 13 January 2019  Report this post
Also it strikes me that Beate Siddrigdaughter at


would love this poem!

Try her.

Jojovits1 at 16:18 on 13 January 2019  Report this post
Thanks Oonah 😁 x

Bazz at 20:21 on 13 January 2019  Report this post
very funny and very real jo, clever and wry with some great rhymes, i especially like the second stanza, some great lines :)

FelixBenson at 21:44 on 13 January 2019  Report this post
Haaaaaa! Loved this Jo, brilliant, hilarious and so bloody true that we are all laughing !! Amazing lines. Loved the ending. Fab!

Jojovits1 at 23:08 on 21 January 2019  Report this post
Thanks Kirsty and Barry!  It may please you to know I did not go to the gym at all last week.  This could be the biggest New Year collapse yet! 😂

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