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Thanksgiving

by Zettel 

Posted: 05 January 2019
Word Count: 112
Summary: Intended as a contribution to the Thanksgiving/Baptism of my grandson


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Thanksgiving

Precious gift of life
Our most cherished son
May you overcome all strife
And we always be at one

From I am to who shall I be
Only time will tell
Learn from what you see
Think clear live well

Life is hope and strength of will
Make your dreams come true
In adversity remember still
Love can see you through

Life is sacred use it well
If you can, then lead
If not, let others tell
But only goodness heed

You are tomorrow and the years to come
We pass the cup to you
Make a difference darling son
But think of others in all you say and do






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Comments by other Members



James Graham at 18:03 on 07 January 2019  Report this post
Congratulations on your new grandson! Just as you have celebrated the young life of your granddaughter, now it’s the turn of your grandson. ‘Thanksgiving’ is a good title. When my own grandchildren were born, as I recall, thankfulness seemed to be the feeling that was uppermost. Perhaps most grandparents would say the same.
 
I will have more to say about the poem over the next day or two, but on first reading one stanza stood out:
 
Life is sacred use it well
If you can, then lead
If not, let others tell
But only goodness heed
 
It’s very wise advice to a young person to be a leader if you can, but be prepared to accept a humbler role if necessary. And in the last line there’s a hope that he will never find himself having to take orders from someone who is using others to achieve purposes which are nefarious or even just ill-conceived. Someone who should never have been a leader. There will be more to say.
 
James.
 

James Graham at 20:58 on 09 January 2019  Report this post
I know this is a poem for a special family occasion rather than one to be ‘workshopped’. There is just one thing, though, that strikes me as not quite right: your wish for your grandson, ‘May your life be free of strife’. It just struck me that I wouldn’t express that wish because no-one’s life is free of strife; better to express the wish that any strife, any adversity, may be overcome. Perhaps
 
May you overcome all strife
 
‘Adversity’ does enter into things in the third stanza, where you say ‘In adversity remember still/ Love can see you through’ which is a much more reasonable, and realistic, thing to say.
 
The second stanza contains words of wisdom too:
 
From I am to who shall I be
Only time will tell
Learn from what you see
Think clear live well
 
The first line is a very concise, poetic way of saying what might be expressed in prose in terms of growing maturity, changes in character and outlook due to life events, etc. One line says that and more. Then the rest of the stanza is saying in effect that not only time will tell if we learn from what happens around us, if we think clearly about life events and what they mean, and if we live according to a humane set of values – in short, our lives do change with the passage of time but we also shape them by our own agency. I’m sure I can take all that from those four lines!
 
Perhaps you will read this poem aloud at the ceremony to come. If so, I’m sure it will be well received. It encapsulates the wishes of many a parent and grandparent.
 
James.

Zettel at 23:53 on 09 January 2019  Report this post
Thanks James. Amended as recommended. Very good point  
BEst
K/Z


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