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True Colours
Posted: 15 February 2004
Word Count: 58
Summary: Nothing like a bit of vitriol.
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Yellow is the colour
Of the man
Who walked.
Blue is the colour
Of the air
I breathe.
White is the colour
Of the icicles
That choke.
Green is the colour
Of my hope,
A hope
That never dies.
Red is the colour
Of my blood
Seeping from
My bleeding heart.
Colourless
The sea of words
That lied.
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Comments by other Members
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 Fearless at 18:45 on 15 February 2004
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If he is such a bastard, then why wait for him to walk? You should run and be forever Red.
Fearless
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miffle at 19:13 on 15 February 2004
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Vitriolic, yes. I like very much the simple structure, the casting of each verse in a different colour. I also like the idea that its sort of a re-working of a 'colour/ rainbow' poem i.e. the unimaginable-spectrum poem not innocent or glistening or brand shiny new. Inspired idea.
A couple of further thoughts: I wonder if you need ' A hope/ That never dies' (?) I guess the structure may fall out of kilter without it (?) - its just that I feel you suggest this in the the initial 2 verse lines (?). Also, is it really so one-sided? (It is unforgiving, mostly). It conjured images of Frida Khalo paintings for me (the 'blood', the 'icicles', the 'choking', the 'pain') but then I know that she was betrayed many times over - as you are here by the 'sea of words' that 'lied'. I think that it's interesting that you distance the 'lying', the betrayal, from the man at this point. I also think the corresponding image that these last 3 lines suggest i.e. of only the pure, honest words having colour - is a wow! It also suggests their worthlessness to you now.
Enjoyed the experience, write on, Nikki ;-)
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roovacrag at 20:08 on 15 February 2004
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Yellow is also a woman that runs.
Blue is a cold colour with no passion.
White is the pale of a face where feelings have gone.
Green is a colour of envy and jealous love.
Red is vibrant and has a way of bouncing back to life.
Nothing is colourless.
Pick up the pallete and start the painting again.
Easy to erase....hard to finish the picture.
xxAlice
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The Walrus at 09:43 on 16 February 2004
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Nikki, thanks for your considered comments. My 'vitriolic' comment was actually supposed to be a bit tongue in cheek. Take your point re: 'A hope that never dies'. Removing it would I feel undermine the structure. Also I like to think of it as an echo/reinforcement. Thanks again. Glad you enjoyed it.
Alice, yes colours can be interpreted in different ways. Have pallet in hand.
Forever Red
xx
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Chem at 13:58 on 16 February 2004
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I really liked this poem, the personification of colours.
Each stanza is individual yet links into a whole really well.
I like that you chose 'colourless' for the 'The sea of words / That lied.' - a good conclusion to the poem.
Em
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