Login   Sign Up 



 

Free Falling

by Rai15 

Posted: 09 February 2004
Word Count: 56
Summary: I'm not too sure about this one, because it's not my usual 'field'.


Font Size
 


Printable Version
Print Double spaced


Spinning faster,
faster down
to greet with darkness
lie unconscious
just alone

Breathing slower,
slower still
yet never to stop
bare, vacant heart
shrivelled

Heart starts beating,
beating harder
wrap your arms around me
warmth and comfort
tiny smile

Body’s warming,
warming my soul
brought back from the end
with hope of this
just a kiss






Favourite this work Favourite This Author


Comments by other Members



The Walrus at 14:50 on 10 February 2004  Report this post
I like this Rai. The first stanza really conveys a feeling of being sucked involuntarily into a vortex. The second, hollowness of hope. The third the resurrection of hope, ('tiny smile' made me think of a small child), and the final stanza the tangibility of hope. It's kind of circular, which I like. Hope my interpretation is not too far off what you intended.

The Walrus




Rai15 at 18:32 on 10 February 2004  Report this post
Yep, that is pretty much exactly what it's all about. Good to know that I can make sense sometimes :). Thanks a lot.

-Rai-


To post comments you need to become a member. If you are already a member, please log in .