Alternative Christmas Carols
by 
nickb
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Posted: 17 December 2014 Word Count: 145 Summary: Just a bit of fun......a few versions you may not have come across. Happy Christmas |
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Good King Wenceslas went out
on the feast of Stephen,
snow and frost lay all about
his blimmin’ feet were freezin’.
All he’d had to eat that day
was a bowl of gru-el,
so he went down to the pub
for some winter fu-u-el.
O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
I watch your needles falling
O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
the mess you make is appalling.
I’m on my knees, the hoover’s blocked
‘cos someone tripped and you got knocked
O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
I hear the bonfire calling.
“When Santa got stuck up the chimney,
he felt rather queer,
the size of his thighs
was down to mince pies
and drinking lots but beer.
And as for the elves
they’re helping themselves
and didn’t hear Santa yelp,
when he got stuck up the chimney
“Oh help, oh help, oh help”.
on the feast of Stephen,
snow and frost lay all about
his blimmin’ feet were freezin’.
All he’d had to eat that day
was a bowl of gru-el,
so he went down to the pub
for some winter fu-u-el.
O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
I watch your needles falling
O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
the mess you make is appalling.
I’m on my knees, the hoover’s blocked
‘cos someone tripped and you got knocked
O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
I hear the bonfire calling.
“When Santa got stuck up the chimney,
he felt rather queer,
the size of his thighs
was down to mince pies
and drinking lots but beer.
And as for the elves
they’re helping themselves
and didn’t hear Santa yelp,
when he got stuck up the chimney
“Oh help, oh help, oh help”.
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James Graham
V`yonne
