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Pulp Fiction

by Powis 

Posted: 27 January 2004
Word Count: 290
Summary: i.m. Raymond Carver


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She wants a beach house in Malibu,
a neat little place, with a calico cat
in the window bay and the breeze
coming in off the ocean, filling the curtains
she’s chosen herself, finding its way off
the Pacific as easily as the words
she taps out on the clean white page…
And you believe her, not because it
happens to be next to Rod Steiger,
(third from the end facing the beach)
but because she makes you see it,
all the way through the bar smoke
to South California, see her working
through the small hours, only stopping
to make fresh coffee, empty the trash,
or load the barrel with another leaf
of clean white paper… and writing,
writing, writing, the kind of stuff you can
show people, that makes them want
to know more, like where you come from
and who your Pop was and when’s
the best time to write… the kind of stuff
that gets you out of bars like this
and into beach houses in Malibu, cats
in calico coats and views of the ocean…
And you want to ask her, seriously
ask her, What is it that stops a person?
makes a body feel they’re living next-door
to life, like a party down the block when
all you get is the bass guitar. But you can’t,
so you buy her a drink, something tall
with a twist of lemon and a name
you’d like to forget… And you ask her
what she likes to hear, because that’s
what we talk about when we talk about love –
like where does she come from and
where the hell is that, who is her Pop
and just when is the best time to write.

Hampstead 1986






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Comments by other Members



roovacrag at 19:55 on 27 January 2004  Report this post
Sorry this is not a poem nor prose,what is it ?Start it as a fiction story, you might get it further. xxxxxxAlice


<Added>

Better to do fiction.Join and be full member and we can see what you are capable off.xxxxxxx Alice

Ellenna at 18:28 on 28 January 2004  Report this post
Fantastic poem.."makes a body feel they’re living next-door
to life, like a party down the block when
all you get is the bass guitar" ... I especially liked this...

Has a very contemporary feel but also has shades of the sixties..I enjoyed this a lot!

welcome to Writewords..David

Ellie:)



Jubbly at 18:41 on 28 January 2004  Report this post
I really enjoyed this David. It worked for me. A story of bitter ambition and envy and adoration. I loved the repetition of the line, 'and just when is the best time to write'. I don't write poetry or normally crit it, but this really drew me into to another place.

Welcome

Julie

Anna Reynolds at 11:29 on 30 January 2004  Report this post
Powis, this is fantastic- the Raymond Carver line is used beautifully and the whole piece has that poignant, slightly dangerous feel that his stories evoked... I too loved the circular, cyclical feel of the repeated line, and the pathos of the 'drink whose name you'd like to forget'. The core idea, that becoming a writer might elevate her to her dream life is beautifully and simply worked. Please show us more if you have some.

miffle at 12:15 on 30 January 2004  Report this post
Reminds me of Cohen's 'Suzanne' (alluring woman drawing you in and you/ we/ the persona are/ is drawn in; a modern siren - the kind a girl might fantasise about being)...Sort of Cohen with a contemporary, 'get you motor spinning' rock and roll feel...Flows hypnotically, tidal...gracias, nikki ;-)

dr_mandrill at 12:29 on 30 January 2004  Report this post
miffle's right: it's rock and roll, it's hypnotic and tidal and oh-so-cool. It's also very very good.

Thanks for this; it's a poem that I'll read again.


dm

Ralph at 20:13 on 30 January 2004  Report this post
David -
Left my lips numb with the pleasure of mouthing these words.
Thanks.

Ralph

Powis at 23:21 on 30 January 2004  Report this post
Hi all,

Can't this how else to do this but here... but just would like to thank you all for your wonderful comments... they arrive like water in the desert... and living in Israel today, I think I know pretty much all there is to know about deserts, political, cultural and literal.

Thank you, thank you, and good luck to you all with your writing.

David (Powis) Jones

Skeetr at 17:18 on 04 March 2004  Report this post
David Jones,

I'm new-ish on WW, so I found this poem only just now. I was blown away... I'll leave it at that, since so much I agree with has already been said above.

All the best,
Smith


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