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Just Friends?

by Bobo 

Posted: 17 December 2003
Word Count: 56
Summary: Can we ever be friends with ex-lovers? Not straightforwardly, methinks! Too much baggage.

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The intimacy we shared
lay murdered by our hands.
Ripped to pieces.
Ripped to shreds.
Shards of wanting cast asunder.

What is there to salvage?
An understanding?
Uneasy friendship?
No easy answer,
I regret.

Careless words have history -
semantics altered by retrospect.
No neutral territory this -
forever a war-zone
littered with shells of resentment.

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Comments by other Members

Fearless at 12:18 on 17 December 2003  Report this post

If I knew the answer I would tell you. Occasional drinks? Sounds fine, but it doesn't work for me, and probably others too. Perhaps its better to fade away, with no hard feelings, no difficult moments. It takes time to fade away, and you need to let them feel they have control of it too, so that it is not imposed upon them.

At the end of the day, I don't do casual acquaintances - do you?

Your brother in spirit,

Bobo at 13:02 on 17 December 2003  Report this post
Well said Fearless. Once you've been so close to someone, intimate, receding to platonic friendship is rarely possible. Each comment appears loaded, double-meanings seem to dominate conversation...too much like hard work methinks!

BoBo x

The Walrus at 14:08 on 17 December 2003  Report this post
Enjoyed reading this. Interesting question, articulately explored. I cannot see in the piece anything positive in terms of the question you are asking. For me, the language is brutal, albeit eloquently so. My view on the subject raised is that a) there are no rules and b) time normally resolves such issues.

Good strong piece Bobo and, very thought provoking.

The Walrus

Fearless at 14:22 on 17 December 2003  Report this post
I think that perhaps human nature being what it is, in all of us, it's quite okay to just let it go. Because time does not always resolve things; sometimes, often, it requires a change in circumstance, i.e. the response. Some things just cannot be, although one can accept that each situation is different. But that depends on what the participants want, and whether they are prepared to fight. Many are not, and that is not a crime, nor anything to be ashamed of. Such is life.


Bobo at 14:51 on 17 December 2003  Report this post
Walrus - my own take on the issue isn't as clear-cut as the poem may imply. I believe that it is possible to be just friends with an ex-partner...BUT only if both parties have accepted fully their new situation, which often isn't the case.

Glad you liked the poem.

BoBo x

Ticonderoga at 12:49 on 30 December 2003  Report this post

Ditto to all compliments; succinct and telling, as ever; one tiny tweek, possibly?: 'semantics altered by retrospect' - better sense and better scansion, I think. But, splendid stuff.

merry thoughts,


Bobo at 13:51 on 30 December 2003  Report this post
Mike - You're right! I knew it wasn't quite the ticket but as ever am blind to specifics! Will amend. Glad you like it.

BoBo x

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