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try as i can

by roovacrag 

Posted: 13 December 2003
Word Count: 33
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Try as I can
i get nowhere.
Do I want another love,
doubt it.

Am I too set in my ways?
not sure,
but then is all not pure,
I just go on.






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Fearless at 16:47 on 15 December 2003  Report this post
Al

This could have been written about anyone, so I urge everyone to just take that chance, while it's there.

Fearless
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TheGodfather at 01:31 on 21 September 2004  Report this post
Alice,

I wondered about the shift from 'I' to 'we' in the pronoun use. I like the overall concept of this poem. Maybe I am just used to your slightly longer, more developed, more image-centered poems. It's a good concept.

TheGodfather
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roovacrag at 12:33 on 21 September 2004  Report this post
Goddy,changed the we to I. Sounds much better.

xx Alice
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TheGodfather at 14:47 on 21 September 2004  Report this post
Alice,

Glad to be of help. You're right, it sounds better.

TheGodfather
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