Login   Sign Up 



 

Gangrel Thochts

by Ticonderoga 

Posted: 28 September 2010
Word Count: 271
Summary: I fear that only James may fully understand this one, unless there are more fellow Scots here than previously. No gloss for now, to see how much comes across, but I will add one if people think it worthwhile/necessary.
Related Works: What then? • 

Font Size
 


Printable Version
Print Double spaced


Heich abune Auld reikie's bustle
Oan the brae o' Blackford Hill
Ah hunker doon tae weet ma whustle
An' gie ma stervit een their fill

O' the scenery streetcht oot ablow.
I've been awa near twanty year
Frae this steich city's ebb an' flow
Bit the saul o' me wis aye up here

Like Rabbie's famous Hieland hairt.
Ayont the tenements and manses
An' th'ower thranged business pairt
Upo the Firth the sunlicht dances

Heedless o' ilka scheme an' schism.
Wi' Arthur's Seat crouched jist ower yonner
Untrauchled here bi' sumph or bisom
Ma imagination taks a dauner

Tae whan the warld seemed unco swait.
Ah first clam Blackford as a wean o' sax,
A douce wee lad an' awfy blate,
Whan the faimily their shanks wad rax

Fur 'oors ower Braid or Pentland Hills.
We stravaiged wi' Mither at the heid
A weedow wi' an' ootsize share o' ills
Oor faither leyin' twa months deid

Haein' sent hissel' tae everlastin' sleep.
Bit we were weans an' she stoot-hairtit
Sae aff we'd gang, oor waes tae dreep
Intil the yird, whaur the hale jink stairtit,

Tae nourish the future's happit floo'rs.
In sic-like fashion we baith grew strang
Yird an' faimily, syne fillin' the 'oors
Wi' the canty maitter o' breengein' alang

The road frae whelpin' tae bidin' in clay.
Bi' keepin' us gangin' she garred us happy....
At ninety-three she's gane her fareweel way
Leain' me wi' mem'ries baith shairp an' sappie

Oan a gowstie brae i' the aifternoon.
Heich abune the scenes o' ma youth,
The ghaist-thranged New an' Auld Toon,
Ah licht a rolly, than slake ma drooth.








Favourite this work Favourite This Author


Comments by other Members



tinyclanger at 21:28 on 28 September 2010  Report this post
oh, please don't give us much of a translation!! I got the overall impression very well, and lots of the lines were very clear to me (I'm now in Geordieland, dunno if that's helpin'
Yes bits of it I'll need to read over and puzzle about to get exact meanings and the subtleties...but I think give us lots of time to work on this before you give us clues/answers.
x
tc

joanie at 22:26 on 28 September 2010  Report this post
Mike, I have had great fun reading this aloud in what I think might be the right sort of sound!

Like tc, I'm more than happy to keep re-reading.

Great to see you!

joanie

Ticonderoga at 13:22 on 29 September 2010  Report this post
Thank you, ladies!! I breathlessly await your further comments........

M x


James Graham at 14:15 on 29 September 2010  Report this post
Hi Mike - The first thing to do with a poem in Scots is to look for tell-tale signs of ‘couthiness’. ‘Feelgood’ isn’t quite the dictionary definition of ‘couthy’, but it’s apt enough, and nice, cosy, happy-peasant poems are still being written. This isn’t one of them.

Far from it - it’s a poem about coming home from ‘exile’, revisiting familiar scenes, and recalling childhood, and it’s full of real stuff. Genuine feeling and genuine depth. These lines especially -

We stravaiged wi' Mither at the heid
A weedow wi' an' ootsize share o' ills
Oor faither leyin' twa months deid

Haein' sent hissel' tae everlastin' sleep.
Bit we were weans an' she stoot-hairtit
Sae aff we'd gang, oor waes tae dreep
Intil the yird, whaur the hale jink stairtit,

Tae nourish the future's happit floo'rs


- capture a time of grief and a ‘stoot-hairtit’ family taking hold of life. I think these lines are especially inspired -

oor waes tae dreep
Intil the yird, whaur the hale jink stairtit


- the kind of lines in Scots that you come across from time to time, that make you feel no other language could express this so well.

There’s humour too, but it’s ‘serious’ humour, as in

fillin' the 'oors
Wi' the canty maitter o' breengein' alang

The road frae whelpin' tae bidin' in clay


This is a very well-crafted poem, too. I notice the way you’ve run on each four-line stanza into the first line of the next. This works perfectly through the whole poem, makes it flow in a different way and avoids making the rhymed verses seem jingly (though I doubt they would have anyway). Nothing couthy about the form either.

I’ll keep on re-reading, and get back to you when other members have got to grips with it. Maybe a link to the online Dictionary of the Scots Language would help?

James.

Ticonderoga at 13:58 on 30 September 2010  Report this post
James -

Thanks you SO much! I haven't attempted a long piece in Scots before - just little squibs, probably guilty of a thought couthiness! I hate the 'kailyard' connection of Scots and sentimentalism, so find your comments anent that very reassuring. I was vaguely thinking of submitting this to New Writing Scotland.....would that be jist daft?

Huge thanks again,

Mike

Ticonderoga at 13:20 on 04 October 2010  Report this post
James -

Many thanks for that. yes, the title was a smarty-pants reference to the idea of the 'apologetic apostrophe' (ha'e etc.), and was all I could come up with at the time........I'll find something suitable in Scots (I hope).

Thanks again,

Mike


To post comments you need to become a member. If you are already a member, please log in .