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by LMJT 

Posted: 03 April 2010
Word Count: 749
Summary: For this week's Bed & Breakfast challenge.


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Though his only plan was to meet Samantha on Saturday, Daniel had booked the room at the bed and breakfast for the whole of the Easter weekend.

He wiped the steam from the mirror in the bathroom and squirted shaving foam into his hand.

It had been a long time since he’d spent a weekend away from Cornwall and he was secretly glad of the change of scene and break in routine. Really, he could have driven to Bristol and back in the same day, but then what would he have done with the rest of the weekend? The answer, he knew, was nothing.

He pressed his razor against his cheek and brought it down to his chin. His stubble, like his hair, was grey nowadays and he wondered how he would appear to Samantha. Would she even recognise him? The man she’d married was not who she would meet today. There may be some forgotten mannerisms, some familiar nuances, but he was not the same man who had left her. No, that man of the past had been twisted with anger and self-loathing. The man of the present could go weeks without feeling any emotion at all. If he was honest, Daniel would have to admit that there were days in which his indifference alarmed him. There were days in which he willed himself to be stirred by something, anything, for his mere existence to be affirmed. But these days were now few and far between. It was better, he had learnt in time, to expect nothing. That way he could never be disappointed.

And yet all that had changed two months ago. When he found out he was a father. For the first time in years, he’d felt a flicker of feeling, of belonging. He was a father.

Hearing his mobile ring, Daniel stepped out of the bathroom to see that it was Samantha calling. His heart lurched as he picked it up. What if she’d changed her mind? What if she didn't want him to meet Christopher after all?

‘Daniel,’ she said when he picked up. ‘Are you in Bristol yet?’

‘I’ve just arrived,’ he replied, sitting on the edge of the bed and bracing himself for bad news.

‘Right. Well, I’m just calling to let you know I’m only going to be able to stay for an hour. Stuart has asked friends of ours for dinner and I’ve nothing in the house. That’s probably easier for you anyway, isn’t it? I mean, how long is the drive back to Cornwall?’

‘Well-,’

‘Exactly,’ she said, interrupting him. There was a pause before she added, ‘Actually, there’s something else I wanted to make clear before we meet.’

‘What’s that?’

She sighed. ‘Let’s just keep the talk about Christopher, shall we? I’m not interested in raking up the past. We have a twenty year old son you’ve never met. And he’s in prison. I think that’s focus enough for the time being, don’t you?’

When Samantha hung up, Daniel looked down at the phone in his hands and felt a pang of regret for even coming here. What the hell was he thinking? Did he honestly think that he could be any sort of father to a son he’d never met? The idea was ludicrous at best, pathetic at worst.

Had it not been for the story in the newspaper, Daniel would never have known he had a son. For twenty years Samantha had done her utmost to ensure that he would never find out. And who could blame her? Who could even question her decision? He, Daniel, completely understood why she had done what she had done. And so why should anything be about to change now?

When his phone rang again, he looked down at the screen to see, ‘Unknown number calling.’

Daniel answered tentatively, fully expecting a robotic voice to inform him that he’d won a cruise or some other such nonsense.

‘It’s Christopher,’ said the voice at the other end of the line.

‘Christopher,’ Daniel echoed dumbly. His grip tightened around the phone.

‘Mum gave me your number and I just-,’

He paused, then carried on: ‘I just wanted to tell you that I don’t care about whatever happened between you and her. You’re my dad. You’re my dad and I want to know you.’

Daniel opened his mouth to reply, but found that he had nothing to say. Moments that felt like hours passed before he said quietly, ‘Thank you. Thank you, Christopher.’







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Comments by other Members



tusker at 08:19 on 04 April 2010  Report this post
I enjoyed this tale of estrangement, Liam.

You describe a sad character but your MC has changed.

That phone call from his son was very poignant. The past is past for MC's wife but MC is still living with regret.

Then there is the question, why is the son in prison? I'd like to know.

2 typos: 4th para. 4th line' 'man 'pf' the past.'

5th line 'in his was honest'

Jennifer

Prospero at 09:11 on 04 April 2010  Report this post
I am with Jennifer on this one Liam, a poignant little tale of the confusion and hurt that can surround the collapse of a relationship.

Well done

Best

John

LMJT at 09:38 on 04 April 2010  Report this post
Thanks for reading Jennifer and John,

Jennifer - Thanks for pointing out the typos. I'm getting worse and worse with them! In regards to the story, the son is in prison for GBH and Daniel has only found out through seeing the story in a tabloid.

John - Thanks for reading.

Liam

crowspark at 09:58 on 04 April 2010  Report this post
I agree, a poignant tale of astrangement, moving from darkness to light.

Well done.

Bill

V`yonne at 10:06 on 04 April 2010  Report this post
Oh I got all choked up at the end. Well depicted emotions! Good story. Send it somewhere.
He, Daniel, completely understood why she had done what she had done.

You can avoid that slight awkward beginning by
Even as the father of the boy, Daniel completely understood why she had done what she had done.

Crimsondelilah at 10:16 on 04 April 2010  Report this post
I enjoyed this Liam. A tale of loss and regret but a chance for the MC to redeem himself at the end. I was curious about the son too - makes me wonder whether his stint in prison has anything to do with not having known his father. Thanks for the read.

Cholero at 12:12 on 04 April 2010  Report this post
Hi Liam

I thought this was great, really well handled, especially the dialogue - the way you pace the conversations is very clever and invisibly done.

I felt truly moved at the end, at that moment when Daniel can't speak.

I liked the undescribed but massive and wholly suggested hinterland of these people's lives, their pasts, and the emotional chasms separating them.

Impressive.

Pete

Jubbly at 22:35 on 04 April 2010  Report this post
I enjoyed this too, I became quite engrossed in the story and wanted to know more, but heck that's a flash for you. Well done.

J


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