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Rotten Apples

by LMJT 

Posted: 14 November 2009
Word Count: 279
Summary: For this week's 'rotten apples' theme. :)


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‘You need some help,’ Kate said in the firm tone that Carol imagined her adopting with her pupils. ‘From someone on a more permanent basis, I mean.’

I can cope,’ Carol lied. ‘I’m not an invalid. The doctors said it might be temporary.’

Kate glanced at Carol’s wheelchair. ‘Then just until we hear back from the hospital and we know what’s happening. That’s all. We can take it a step at a time.’

Taking a sip of her tea, Carol looked at her daughter on the other side of the kitchen table. She was right, of course, but the thought of surrendering her independence, even temporarily, filled Carol with dread. She’d celebrated her seventieth birthday earlier in the year and, until the road accident last month, not once felt her age. How quickly things could change. If only she’d not taken the car out that day, if only she’d gone to Tesco instead of Waitrose, if only-,

‘I know you’re going to hate my saying this,’ Kate continued, interrupting her thoughts. ‘But the garden-,’

Carol looked through the windows of the French doors beside them. On the vast lawn lay dozens of plump, brown apples, riddled with rot. Until now, Carol had pretended not to notice them and the defeat that they symbolised. Ever since Kate had been little, she’d always found use for the surplus fruit that the apple tree bore; there’d not been chance for rot to set in. But things were changing now, she knew that. She would be a fool to pretend they ever would be the same again.

And so it was with weary resignation that she replied, ‘I suppose some help wouldn’t hurt.’






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Comments by other Members



tusker at 18:59 on 14 November 2009  Report this post
So sad Liam, but a good story of getting older, being suddenly and hatefully dependent on your own child. Worse still, having to admit to it.


Jennifer



choille at 19:02 on 14 November 2009  Report this post
Very sad - the apples symbolising the loss of independence in a way.

The daughter seems quite abrupt - why not just go out & pick them up for goodness sake, I wanted to shout. It is as if she is rubbing her Mother's face in the fact that she is unable, but then again I suppose she is trying to persaude her Mother that she needs help. Very much the teacher - the daughter I thought.

Nice flash
All the best
Caroline.



Bunbry at 19:11 on 14 November 2009  Report this post
Another nice 'relationship' story Liam, you do them so well.

A tiny point, if I had a female character of 70 I would choose a more old fashioned name (Margaret, Edith etc.) While I'm sure there are 70 year old Carols out there, I think it help the reader get to grips with the story.

Longhand at 20:30 on 14 November 2009  Report this post
This is great. I like the image of the apples rotting for the first time and what it symbolises.

I agree with Bunbry about the name, Carol just doesn't sound old enough.

Prospero at 00:56 on 15 November 2009  Report this post
I can only the echo the others. The aging apples is such a good metaphor for the advancing years.

Well done.

Best

John

LMJT at 10:54 on 15 November 2009  Report this post
Thanks for your comments, everyone.

Liam

crowspark at 12:11 on 15 November 2009  Report this post
Nicely done. Perhaps you could get her age, or the wheelchair into the first para, or perhaps a suitable name as Nick suggested.

Good luck with this.

Bill

Findy at 12:29 on 15 November 2009  Report this post
Really nice, loved the way you have brought out Carol's helplessness and agony at her loss of independence.

findy

Dreamer at 00:53 on 16 November 2009  Report this post
Nice one Liam,

I liked the way the apples were used to show her need for help and the loss of her independence. Rotten thing that, the loss of independence that is. Here, seniors need to take a driving test every year. While I understand the need for it, I would be insulted by the very thought of some guy who was in diapers when I started driving deciding if I can continue.
Not a big fan of people having the power to dictate much of anything to me...


Best,

Brian.


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