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The Generic Brands

by M. Close 

Posted: 29 October 2009
Word Count: 218
Summary: For the week 64 challenge


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You must visit the Chemist, Stagnatius Reek, at his shop,
so say the instructions, to get the proper result.
But maybe I have some in stock, and generic brands are just as good,
right? Let’s see what we need….

Eye of newt, a frog, a toad. These I have right here.
Wing of a bat with something disgusting
rolled up in that, along with the tail of a rat,
and some blood, dried blood from a chicken.

Dribbles of snot from an old geezer’s nose,
some of the jam from in between toes,
the trail of a snail and three fleas from a camel,
yes, all that is here, these will do I suppose.

We need powder ground from murderer’s bones but,
bones are just bones and ground down they make powder.
I’ll just use these, what does it matter?
And now, for the last ingredient….

Two drops of pure vanilla extract.
Drop…..
Drop…..
BANG!

The explosion was loud, I woke startled and blurry
my clothes singed and shredded, the workshop in tatters.
The potion, still steaming, clung to the ceiling and
dribbled down the walls.

You must visit the Chemist, Stagnatius Reek, at his shop,
so say the instructions. Pay attention.
The generic brands are not the same. Who knew?
What a sticky, smelly mess to clean.






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Comments by other Members



V`yonne at 16:39 on 29 October 2009  Report this post
That's very funny. It loses rhythm in places. You'd be better trying to stick with the same rhythm throughout this

rolled up in that, and the tail of a rat,
and some blood too, dried blood from a chicken.

some of the jam from inbetween my toes

(truly revolting!)

but maybe it doesn't matter - with the explosion especially. I liked
Two drops of pure vanilla extract.
Drop…..
Drop…..
BANG!

joanie at 19:50 on 29 October 2009  Report this post
Hi Mike. I really like this. The title was intriguing - very clever! I sort of agree with Oonah, that when the rhythm is there in some parts, you want it to carry on.

A great response to your own challenge. I'm going to start mine soon!

joanie

Nella at 20:54 on 29 October 2009  Report this post
Some great rhythm there in parts - agree with Oonah that it's a pity that it is lost at times. I enjoyed this very much - an amusing take on the challenge.

Robin

jenzarina at 21:24 on 29 October 2009  Report this post
The rhythm was a little jerky but the ideas were great... I can just imagine Macbeth's three witches going to get their branded goods!

some of the jam from in between toes

Yuk yuk yuk!!

<Added>

Stagnatius Reek

A name worthy of Dickens
:)

FelixBenson at 13:15 on 31 October 2009  Report this post
Ha Ha. What spooky images you've painted here, and wonderful details in the potion - I almost wanted to see it accompanied by illustrations in a spooky comic book style.
Loved the name too. I'd agree with the advice about the rhythm - would be good if it could be kept even, but the overall effect of the poem is brilliant, imaginative fun!

Kirsty

Findy at 13:39 on 31 October 2009  Report this post
Ha ha, enjoyed this Mike.

findy

M. Close at 04:52 on 02 November 2009  Report this post
Thank you all for your comments. Sounds like I need to work on my rhythm

Mike


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