Login   Sign Up 



 

Remembering

by Jumbo 

Posted: 20 April 2009
Word Count: 100
Summary: For the 'number' challenge. But not an original idea, I fear!


Font Size
 


Printable Version
Print Double spaced


A boy is sitting on a bench in a park when an old man sits next to him and starts to read his newspaper. The boy’s attention is grabbed by a tattoo on the man’s arm.
‘Hey, that’s some ink you got there, Grandad. What’s it about?’
The man runs a finger along the line of numbers. ‘It’s about a time of violence, when some people tried to wipe out another race because they didn’t fit in.’
‘And is that why you keep it, so you don’t forget?’
‘No,’ said the old guy. ‘I keep it so you don’t forget.’






Favourite this work Favourite This Author


Comments by other Members



jenzarina at 23:15 on 20 April 2009  Report this post
Have you and Prospero been going for beers again?

I like the simplicity of this.

Prospero at 05:48 on 21 April 2009  Report this post
Holy Cow! Jumbs

That is uncanny. We have independently written virtually the same story.

How weird is that?

Great writing with an easy fluidity that brings you effortlessly to the punch line.

Best

John

tusker at 15:23 on 21 April 2009  Report this post
Very good, John. It hits the spot in so few but powerful words.

Jennifer

J0ul35 at 16:02 on 21 April 2009  Report this post
A highly enjoyabale read.
I've been really impressed with the 100 words flashes i've read so far.

All the best,
Julie

Bunbry at 17:25 on 21 April 2009  Report this post
A case of great minds thinking alike here!

Nice work, well done.

Nick

V`yonne at 22:10 on 21 April 2009  Report this post
John and John, You and Sean been looking into each others' souls? Both great stories!

Forbes at 00:07 on 22 April 2009  Report this post
John

The same - but very different.

A fresh fillup from cheeky youth, and a perfect answer. Nailed it.

Do you and t'other one go to the "John" together too - get it?!!!

Cheers

Avis ;

<Added>

It's a cracker!! It's the way I tell 'em.

Dreamer at 20:35 on 22 April 2009  Report this post
Well done John,

Loved the punch line! Perfect.
Interesting particularly in view of my comments on Prosp's. This guy has left his tattoo precisely so that others don't forget. Brilliant.

Initially I did not like the opening because it was too much 'tell' right off, but the ending is, how do you say, cracker!


Best,

Brian.

Jordan789 at 06:17 on 23 April 2009  Report this post
Hey Jumbs,

I like this. It's a rare and random moment to have such varied souls cross paths, and have them connect in a way that is as beautiful as an old poem.

Jordan

Jumbo at 08:58 on 24 April 2009  Report this post
Jennifer,

No beers - unfortunately!!

Thanks for your kind comments.

john

Jumbo at 08:59 on 24 April 2009  Report this post
Prosp

Very strange, my friend.

Thank you for you kind comments.

All the best

john

Jumbo at 08:59 on 24 April 2009  Report this post
Thanks, Jennifer

Jumbo at 09:00 on 24 April 2009  Report this post
It's true, Julie - we're a talented bunch of Flashers!!

Thanks for reading,

john

Jumbo at 09:00 on 24 April 2009  Report this post
Thaks, Nick

You're very kind,

john

Jumbo at 09:01 on 24 April 2009  Report this post
Cheers, Oonah

Much obliged

john

Jumbo at 09:03 on 24 April 2009  Report this post
Yes... thanks, Avis.

I'm glad it worked for you.

Did you make it to the Book Fayre thingy in London? How was it?

All the best

john

Jumbo at 09:05 on 24 April 2009  Report this post
Brian

Hi

Thanks for reading and commenting.

Maybe you're right, a bit too 'tell' at the start - but one of the limitations of drabbles, I guess? That's my excuse, anyway!

Thanks for reading,

john



Dreamer at 10:59 on 24 April 2009  Report this post
Yes,

drabbles are very limiting in that way which is why I'll pass on this one. Don't get me wrong, thought it was well done. I surely could not do better.

B.

Forbes at 11:41 on 24 April 2009  Report this post
Book Fair was an experience. The lunch with other WWers was the best bit. I escaped ~ 3ish but the others decamped to apub and were still going strong @ 7pm - hangovers for all the next day I hear. If you are on facebook there are some pictures of when we were all fairly sober!!

Cheers

Avis

Jumbo at 00:30 on 26 April 2009  Report this post
Thanks, Avis.

Nice to know some things haven't changed!

Cheers

john

ps no facebook or...


To post comments you need to become a member. If you are already a member, please log in .