Login   Sign Up 



 

The Reunion

by freynolds 

Posted: 11 April 2009
Word Count: 1518
Summary: The whole of ACT I edited - there are only 2 acts and ACT II will follow shortly. Thanks for feedback on the edited version.


Font Size
 


Printable Version
Print Double spaced


AACT I, SCENE I

THE SCENE OPENS ON A LARGE ROOM. IT IS THE LIBRARY OF A MANOR HOUSE. IT IS EMPTY EXCEPT FOR THE MAJOR-DOMO (LOUIS) WHO IS BUSY PLACING GLASSES ON A TRAY. HE CHECKS THAT THE SELECTION OF BOTTLES IN THE BAR AREA OFFERS A CHOICE FOR EVERYONE’S PALATE. HAPPY THAT EVERYTHING IS IN ORDER AND READY FOR THE GUESTS, HE LEAVES THE ROOM. VOICES CAN BE HEARD IN THE CORRIDOR. LOUIS OPENS THE DOOR AND EMILY ENTERS.

EMILY POURS HERSELF A GLASS OF WHITE WINE. SHE IS LOOKING AT THE BOOKS ON THE SHELVES, THINKING ALOUD.
EMILY: My, my, I never thought Alan was such a successful writer. He has never told us how he made his money but now I understand where it might have come from. The Heaviness of being, No man no fool, Craters of Venus, The heart of stones… (Here she hesitates). The gang of murderers, I say this sounds interesting.
MORE VOICES CAN BE HEARD IN THE CORRIDOR. THE DOOR OPENS AND RACHEL ENTERS THE ROOM.
RACHEL: Emily! You have not changed in fifteen years. What is secret for eternal youth?
EMILY: The same as you, obviously by the way you look. You could pass for a thirty year old any time.
THERE ARE MORE VOICES COMING FROM THE CORRIDOR. THE DOOR OPENS, PETER AND JONATHAN ENTER.
PETER: Rachel, Emily! If I did not know you I would be quite attracted to you both. By god, you haven’t changed a bit. What’s your secret? THEY HUG.
RACHEL: Avoiding men! By the looks of it you could do with some magic ingredients yourself.
PETER POURS TWO GLASSES OF RED WINE AND HANDS ONE TO JONATHAN AND WINKS.
JONATHAN (giggling): Nice to see you too Rachel! You haven’t lost any of your venom either. And how is my sweet fair Emily?
EMILY: I am as sweet as ever and as single as ever. I despair of ever finding the right pair of shoes.
JONATHAN: A pair, why not just the one shoe?
EMILY: That would be really boring. You know me Darling, I need variety in my life!
PETER: Yes, we do remember. That’s probably why you are still single.
MORE VOICES CAN BE HEARD FROM THE CORRIDOR. ENTER GREGORY AND KELLY. THEY ALL HUG EACH OTHER.
Gregory: “Hey guys, nice to see you all. Now that we are here the party may begin.”
GREGORY POURS KELLY A GLASS OF RED WINE AND A WHISKY FOR HIMSELF.
Kelly: “Where is Alan by the way?”
Rachel: “Louis told us he would join later and to start without him.”
ENTERS LOUIS THE MAJOR-DOMO.
LOUIS: Ladies and gentlemen, if you would please be seated in the dining room, dinner is about to be served. Sir Gray has been delayed but he will be joining you as soon as he can.
THEY ALL LEAVE THE ROOM.

ACT I SCENE II
VOICES CAN BE HEARD. BY THE SOUND OF IT ALL GUESTS ARE NOW IN MERRY SPIRITS AS LAUGHTER CAN BE HEARD. KELLY ENTERS FIRST STILL LAUGHING FOLLOWED BY THE OTHERS. SHE SITS DOWN.
Kelly: I wonder if Alan is going to turn up at all. It’s almost ten o’clock.
EVERYONE ELSE SITS DOWN. A CRACKLING LIKE THAT OF A RADIO CAN BE HEARD. A VOICE STARTS SPEAKING.
VOICE: Good evening all. I hope that you have had a pleasant time, thus far. Well let’s not dally over your reason for being here. It is a reunion but perhaps not the kind of reunion you had in mind. You were invited and came freely but you are not permitted to leave of your own free will.
GASPS FROM ALL. RACHEL RUNS TOWARDS THE DOOR AND TRIES TO OPEN IT. IT IS LOCKED. KELLY LIFTS THE TELEPHONE TO HER EAR BUT THERE IS NO TONE. JONATHAN GIGGLES.
JONATHAN: Alan? Trust you to play a joke on us. You always did and we always took the bait. Well you win again. Come and join us now.
VOICE IGNORING JONATHAN: You have been invited here to clarify a few things, mainly to find out what happened to Richard twenty years ago.
RACHEL: Alan, is that you?
VOICE: Perhaps it is and perhaps it is not, it is for me to know and for you to find out.
JONATHAN: It sounds like Alan but 20 years is a long time.
VOICE: You are right Jonathan, 20 years is a long time let me refresh your memories. 20 years ago you were all on holidays in Corsica. There were 8 of you but it seems only 7 returned to England? What happened?
RACHEL: Alan pushed Richard down the cliff.
VOICE: Did he really? (He hisses) Is that what happened? Did you try to stop him, Rachel?
RACHEL: I didn’t know what to do. They were having a fight. Either could have fallen off that cliff or anyone who had interfered.
VOICE: But you didn’t say anything to stop it, Rachel, did you? Neither did Emily. Why not Emily, you were also having a secret relationship with him, but I’m not sure anyone knew at the time.
RACHEL: Emily was what? (She is looking at Emily in complete shock).
VOICE: Tell her Emily, what a conniving vixen you were or is that too painful for sweet Emily to admit to?
EMILY: It was such a long time ago (she sighs) and Richard stopped seeing me as soon as he had made up his mind that it was Rachel he wanted to marry. In any case, it was not me who made up the explanation for the police that day, was it? It was Kelly, butter would not melt in my mouth Kelly who was not involved with anyone else, yet was infusing venom in Alan’s ears?
KELLY (impatient): I had to tell Alan that Rachel had accepted to marry Richard since none of you had the guts to do it. I did what was best for all of us at the time. We were only twenty for Christ’s sake, what would the truth have done for all of us? Ruined all potential for career? Where would we be now if we had told the truth?
VOICE: The truth about Peter and Jonathan delaying calling the police? The truth about Alan being the last person to see Richard alive? But he was not, was he Gregory?
GREGORY: (swallowing hard and bending his head): No, he was not. After he…fell, I went to look for Richard.
VOICE: And what did you see Gregory?
GREGORY (shaking violently):I…err, saw Richard kill Alan.
RACHEL (standing up): You what? (She sounds afraid).
VOICE: Think Rachel! (Raising his voice). Has any of you seen either Richard or Alan since that day?
RACHEL: I don’t know. I haven’t but it doesn’t mean no one else has.
VOICE: Well, has any of you seen Richard or Alan in the last twenty years?
THEY ALL SHAKE THEY HEAD AND SAY: NO!
KELLY (standing up and facing towards where the voice can be heard): So if Alan is the one who died that night, was it Richard in the wheelchair all those years?
VOICE (sounding angry): Who says Alan died that night? The story of the wheelchair was a good one and it made you feel guilty all these years, didn’t it? This is why none of you tried to be in touch with each other. If you pretended nothing had happened, life could go on and you could become the writer, musician, publicist or wife you wanted to be.
JONATHAN: Whose funeral did we attend ten years ago? We were grieving Richard who had spent ten years of his life in a wheelchair. Now you tell us that Richard was never in a wheelchair, so who did we burry? It could not have been Alan if he was already dead, it wasn’t…”
VOICE (interrupting him): Whose funeral do you think it was Jonathan? Could it have been Peter’s lover? You found out Peter had a lover, a younger man. After all these years you could not believe Peter could have been seduced by anyone else. Oh, you did not think for one minute that your relationship with Peter was a secret, did you? We all knew about it. A ten year old would have sussed it out. Wherever we went, there was Peter and Jonathan, come on, it was not that difficult even in those days.
PETER (looking shaken and guilty): Jonathan, you knew about Matt? I felt so relieved when he did not turn up for our next date. All the time I was seeing him, only a couple of weeks, I was feeling so guilty and that day I had made up my mind to tell him it was all over.”
JONATHAN: I know Peter, that’s why I approached him and told him you were having second thoughts. I pretended to be your brother and he believed the whole story and I forgave you.”
EMILY: But, if it wasn’t Alan or Richard or that guy, Matt, we buried on that day, who was it Alan… Richard?”
THERE IS NO REPLY.







Favourite this work Favourite This Author


Comments by other Members



nezelette at 22:29 on 12 April 2009  Report this post
Hi again
I like it, I think the dialogues are very natural and you can picture actors playing the parts, which I guess is good! It's a bit hard to get an idea with such a sort extract, as the ctions hasn't reaaly started yet. I wonder what will happen next!

Mand245 at 12:27 on 13 April 2009  Report this post
Hi Fabianne

I thought this was a good opening but I would have liked it if you'd posted more!

The Heaviness of being, No man no fool, Craters of Venus, The heart of stones… (Here she hesitates). The gang of murderers


I loved your book titles!

Being such a short extract I wasn't clear as to whether this was a contemporary or period piece.

I say this sounds interesting.


If it's a period piece then "I say" sounds right, but if it's present day then this sounds a little stilted to me.

You have not changed in fifteen years.
I am as sweet as ever


Just a general observation; personally I feel "You have" and "I am" are too formal for dialogue and I'd prefer "You've" and "I'm" - but that's just me!

Really looking forward to reading more of this. I think these are going to be interesting characters and I'm intrigued as to what happens next!

Mand

Jane Elmor at 16:12 on 13 April 2009  Report this post
Hi Fabienne - yes, we need more! I enjoyed reading this, and think it's a good opening scene-setter - I'm quite intrigued by the characters and set-up and want to know what happens. I'd agree with Mand, in that although I can visualise it quite well, I'm not sure if it's contemporary or period - things like 'hey guys' make it sound contemporary, but as Mand says, 'I say' sounds from longer ago. Although, I assume they're all posh, being in this manor house - in which case perhaps 'I say' would be OK?! Are you French writing in English then?!?!?! If so, bloody hell! Impressed doesn't even describe it!
Just a couple of details;-
LOUIS OPENS THE DOOR AND ENTERS EMILY.

I think you should probably change this to 'AND EMILY ENTERS'... the other way round it could have quite a different meaning and change the opening of the play really rather a lot! ;

What eternal youth secret do you have?

I think this sounds a little clunky in English... we'd more likely say; 'What's your secret of eternal youth?' or 'What's the secret of your eternal youth?'

Rachel, Emily! If I did not know you I would be quite attracted to you both.

I really like this line! Funny!

By the looks of it you haven’t either of you.

I wasn't sure of the meaning of this? Again, it's just the phrasing that doesn't sound quite English. Do you mean they haven't aged either, or that they don't look as though they have been avoiding men?!
Post up some Fabienne!
JCx

<Added>

Er - that should have said 'post up some more Fabienne'. My English is not so great!

freynolds at 12:07 on 14 April 2009  Report this post
Thanks everyone for posting comments, much appreciated. Indeed, English is not my native language. I am not the only linguist in this group as Nezelette is also a "language juggler".

I am still laughing out loud every time I read Jane's comment on the sentence:
LOUIS OPENS THE DOOR AND ENTERS EMILY.

I had not even considered the possibility but this definitely need editing!

Thanks for the suggestions on the choice of words, I will bear them in mind and see if you think I ought to edit them after I have posted the next scene which is s little longer than this one. I'd like to have your impressions after this additional scene about the period this is set in, to make sure I got it right.

The reason why I only posted this first scene was to assess if it was good enough for me to post more. Thank you all for being so positive on it, this play is like an old friend I have not seen for years and as such it may need readjusting. I'll post the next scene very soon.

Best wishes

Fabienne

Mand245 at 08:38 on 15 April 2009  Report this post
Hi Fabianne

Great that you decided to upload more of this play! I think it must be enormously difficult to write in anything other than your first language!

The characters are beginning to shape up nicely, as is the mystery! I loved the characters different reactions to being locked in the room!

I have a couple of general comments.

I found “The Voice” a little confusing. When he starts speaking the characters seem to believe this is Alan speaking, and the voice seems to confirm this, but toward the end of the piece there is doubt cast on the identity of the voice. If Gregory saw Alan being murdered, how could he, along with the rest of the characters, have been expecting Alan to join the party?

It may be me and I’ll read it again later but as I say, a little confusing!

I also felt that, as a reader, I was being bombarded with a little too much information in too short a space of time. Of course, this is a play so it’s intended to be seen rather than read, and I have no idea how long the completed piece is but maybe some of the back story of what happened twenty years ago could be introduced over a few more scenes.

Did I really? (He smirks) Is that what happened? Did you try to stop me, Rachel?

As “The Voice” is off stage we wouldn’t see him smirk!

I do wish I was able to read this in French (unfortunately I don’t know any French) because I think maybe some of the confusion I felt could be down to the translation rather than the content!

Overall I think this is an intriguing mystery. I have no idea where it’s heading and I’m really intrigued as to what happened and who died! Can’t wait to read more!

Keep it coming!

Mand


freynolds at 09:29 on 15 April 2009  Report this post
Thanks Mand. Very valid and helpful comments. I'll make a few edits to address these points. I felt it needed fresh sets of eyes to look at it and point out any inconsistencies.

This is a short play. There is only one more scene after this one. The brief I followed when re-writing it was that it should be no longer than an hour. I'll make a few revisions today.

Best

Fabienne

pwhybrow at 17:26 on 15 April 2009  Report this post
Hi Fabienne

It has been a while since I read a script like this so take my opinions with a pinch of salt.

I thought that act 1 scene 1 was too short, the characters need more time in this dialogue to introduce themself and the reason they are there. As Mand points out, Act 2 does tend to bombard the reader with information, especially names which bounce around. I think the characters need to settle in with the audience and the opening act may be a good place for this.

Good plot developing. Reminds me of 'An Inspector Calls'.

Regards

Peter




SJ Williamson at 16:34 on 22 April 2009  Report this post
If I did not know you I would be quite attracted to you both.


Brilliant line! I love it.

Just a small suggestion - do you think they would have thought it was a joke first? Jonathan may have giggled and said his line before anybody would have panicked and run to the door.

I like this a lot, but my tiny brain can't quite cope with all the information coming at me in the second scene near the end! I guess it's because I'm so used to reading stories rather than plays. Gosh ... it must be tricky to write.

The others have raised all the points I thought of other than this, so all I can say now is, impressed with your ideas Fabienne, and with some tweaking and as others have said, lots more to it, I'm sure this will be great.

SJx

freynolds at 16:55 on 22 April 2009  Report this post
Thanks SJ for your feedback. You are right, plays are very different to stories as they tend to be acted and not read and the actors are a very important factor as they are the one that convey the story. Having said that I have taken note of the comments on the amount of information to take in and one of these days I'll revisit Act I, Scene I as Peter suggested to impart some of the info from scene 2, there. It might make it a little more digestible.

Fabienne


To post comments you need to become a member. If you are already a member, please log in .