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The thorn in your side

by Epona Love 

Posted: 19 March 2009
Word Count: 176
Summary: This is drawn from a combination of different experience. Not sure if it works at all? I'm reading some works in a few weeks and suggestions would be helpful, thanks... also if there are any other poems that anyone thinks would suit a reading?

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I spoke, with tremor, unconvincing
Empty expressions of my self.
Behind the mask, exploding darkly
Wrenched my soul, encased by stealth
Churned my stomach, for the needing
To be seen, witnessed inside
And with vital organs bleeding
Gushed out all, no sense of pride…

Then waited, breath held, for the moment.
Recognition was denied
No comprehension of my meaning
Nothing there but… suicide?
Deeper stole the soul inside me
Further hidden from the view
Humanity, once more, decried me
And the hopeless darkness grew…

But I am bored with that old story
I have heard it all before
All the pain once stored inside me
Is escaping, I’ve kept score
Of every noxious passing comment
Every barbed and brutal phrase
And too late you may lament
What understanding could have raised.

I have grown, a thorn beside you,
Passionless, politely praised
I have towed the line you drew
Cowering beneath your shade
I have walked a mile in your shoes
Understanding your despair
I’ve been nurtured in your issues
I have learned how not to care.

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Comments by other Members

nickb at 15:19 on 30 March 2009  Report this post
Hi Epona Love, this would seem to come from quite a dark place but I like the fact it reaches the bottom and starts to climb up again, not necessarily a sense of optimism but certainly one of resolution.

I find the image of the growing thorn an interesting one. To my mind it does two things. It implies the lack of recognition (in comparison to the rose presumably?), but also by the end I have the distinct impression that it will turn into a thorn in the side.

I couldn't quite get the sense of:

[Behind the mask, exploding darkly
Wrenched my soul, encased by stealth
Churned my stomach, for the needing
To be seen]

Each phrase is really strong but I'm not sure that it hangs together as a whole.

Really thought provoking poem though, full of passion.


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