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Who else will love you?
Posted: 02 January 2009
Word Count: 100
Summary: I wrote about 9 of these little flash dribbles. Involving everything from a duchess who goes poor to a boy scout who gets duct taped to a tree, and then there's this one.
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We violated ourselves on a nightly basis to a sound track of ritualistic moans and a mix of Gershwin and Mozart. This lasted for six months.
I had savored her skin, the way it bled when tickled with a razor; I savored her clavicle, like the curve of a harp under my finger, my tongue.
One night she told me, “This isn’t what I want anymore.” The memories of our love scarred her pale upper arms like raised tattoos of albino worms.
“Who else will love you?” I touched a scar.
She began to dress.
“Who else will love you?”
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Comments by other Members
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 Prospero at 08:52 on 03 January 2009
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Wow!
Powerful stuff, Jordan. That last line is a knock-down, drag-out stunner.
I wish I had written this.
Best
Prosp
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 Jumbo at 10:36 on 03 January 2009
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Hi
Briliiant images, Jordan: the razor, the blood and the scars.
And ewhat a finalquestion. But I'm sure there is someone!
Thanks ofr sharing this. Very enjoyable.
Regards
john
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 Bunbry at 11:11 on 03 January 2009
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Your perseverance certainly paid off Jordan because you came up with a sizzler here. Well Done, top draw material.
Nick
PS Autobiographical I presume?!
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tiger_bright at 11:26 on 03 January 2009
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Nasty stuff, Jordan, very powerful. I liked the harp of her clavicle. Not so sure about the albino worms. I want to read about the boy scout duct-taped to the tree! Is that wrong of me?
Tiger
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 V`yonne at 12:24 on 03 January 2009
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There was one like that (about cutting) on EDF one day last year. I only get to the first suggestion of it then my stomach objects and I can't read on so...sorry. I'm sure the rest is good.
Oonah
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Jordan789 at 15:08 on 03 January 2009
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oonah: It is some nasty stuff!!
tiger: thanks for reading. I somewhat agree with you about the "worms" as they seemed almost too thick and gruesome, but I am somewhat okay with that too.
Nick: Its auto-biographical in the sense that we all have to live with our partners' flaws. not the cutting part though i'm not one for pain.
Jumbo and Prosp: thanks for reading, guys. Your support means a lot.
Jordan
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tiger_bright at 16:07 on 03 January 2009
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Hi Jordan, it wasn't that the worms were gruesome. Rather it felt like one metaphor too many coming straight after the raised tattoos. I think the image is clear and sharp, and the words you use to describe it ought to be the same - sharp cuts like they're making on each other?
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V`yonne at 16:18 on 03 January 2009
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Yeah, sorry, Jordan. There aren't many things get to me but SM does and I won't tell people the other - it's evensillier  Of course I relieve you of any need to comment on mine, in return...
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choille at 20:20 on 03 January 2009
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Hi Jordan - very good - very slick.
Quite gruesome with all the cutting - the albino worms works for me.
The ending is really brilliant - as if he's had her, spoilt her & now no one will want her -he sounds very cruel.
Great stuff.
All the best
caroline.
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