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Where Have All The Flowers Gone?

by tusker 

Posted: 12 June 2008
Word Count: 287
Summary: For Flash 1 challenge.


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Miss Mary Contrary lived not far from the sea but, despite salty breezes, she'd cultivated a verdant garden. Then, one morning, about to water her prize lilies, petunias, geraniums and lobelia, she found her small plot, overnight, had turned into The Sahara Desert.

'Goodness gracious!' exclaimed Postman Pam, stepping through the garden gate, her black and white dog, Scruff, following behind.

Dumbfounded, Miss Mary Contrary started to cry and Postman Pam stroked the distressed woman's shoulders that shook like a mini earthquake.

'Call the police!' Mary wailed.

'Can't love,' Postman Pam replied. 'They only come out for murder these days.'

'It is murder,' Miss Mary sobbed, adding in a screech of realisation, 'And Dunely's Best Garden is being judged next Friday!'

'There, there,' Postman Pam soothed. 'You've won it every year over the past ten years.'

Miss Mary stamped her foot. 'That's not the point.'

For a long moment, deep in thought, both stared at the devastation before them. Then Postman Pam, taking hold of Miss Mary's hand, said, 'I've an idea.'

Miss Mary, glancing down at the hand that held hers, asked in a strange, sultry voice, 'What is it?' Winking, Postman Pam, rolled up her sleeves and asked for a mug of strong tea. No milk. Two sugars.

The following Friday, three judges arrived at Miss Mary's neat home, their eyes widening with pleased astonishment. Thousand of winkle shells blinked in the sun. Pebbles of every hue curved around mounds of sand and coarse grass from where Sea Thrift, Twickle Purple, Lamb's Tongues, Sedums and Tuscan Blue flourished in their own natural surroundings.

Extremely satisfied with the ingenious display, all three judges, including the vicar, announced Miss Mary Contrary the overall winner in every category.







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Comments by other Members



Elbowsnitch at 13:00 on 12 June 2008  Report this post
Hi Jennifer, I like the way this simple, Postman Pat-like story turns into a hot lesbian romance!

The garden sounds lovely, too - bit like a female version of Derek Jarman' s garden at Dungeness.

In the last para, should ' ingenuous' be ' ingenious' ?

nicely original!

Frances

tusker at 13:08 on 12 June 2008  Report this post
Thanks Frances. Yes, it should be ' ingenious' . My spelling is awful. And I blame my computer, it didn' t tell me. Good excuse.

Jennifer

V`yonne at 13:13 on 12 June 2008  Report this post
I read the first three words and thought AHA, this is not goint to be theinnocent little tale we all know and love... And as Frances says 0 The vicar of course knew not what had gone on... )

I really like it. Well done, you!

Pick:
Thousand of

V`yonne at 13:15 on 12 June 2008  Report this post
Me winky dinkies aren' t working and the site won' t let me edit the post... I had difficulty getting on here at all last night. What' s happening???

tusker at 13:21 on 12 June 2008  Report this post
Winky dinkies can be a nuisance. Makes my eyes water every time. Thanks for your kind comments.

Jennifer

titania177 at 13:27 on 12 June 2008  Report this post
Lovely, Jennifer! I am so incredibly impressed by everyone' s vast flower and plant knowledge, you Green-fingered lot. And the tone of this flash is just spot on, great innuendo spicing up the children' s-story-voice. Excellent!

Tania

tusker at 16:02 on 12 June 2008  Report this post
Thanks Tania. Mary, Mary quite contrary came into my mind and got stuck there. Looked up the seaside flowers even though I live close to the sea. Not that green fingered.

Jennifer

Forbes at 19:03 on 12 June 2008  Report this post
Well I think it could be a best selling kiddies book!! Something for the adults too! Mind you you' d have to be careful on the illustrations!!

Nice one Jennifer, it made me smile!

Cheers

Avis

Prospero at 21:22 on 12 June 2008  Report this post
Very good, Jennifer, I even caught a scent of the allusions, which are like aspersions but more delicate, a perfect complement to pansies.

Thanks for the read and the entertainment.

Best

John

V`yonne at 21:47 on 12 June 2008  Report this post
Ummm....I wouldn' t ask Prosp to do the illustrations, Jen...

Prospero at 05:54 on 13 June 2008  Report this post
Why not? I' m top drawer, I' ll have you know.

Prosp R.A.

V`yonne at 11:10 on 13 June 2008  Report this post
In that case you can start work on the Jam stories

tiger_bright at 11:18 on 13 June 2008  Report this post
Hi Jennifer, this made me smile. Lovely flash. I could really see the shell garden.

tusker at 14:25 on 13 June 2008  Report this post
Thanks Avis, glad it made you smile.

Jennifer

tusker at 14:32 on 13 June 2008  Report this post
Thanks John, All innocent, I say. And if I do write more of the like, I will ask you if you could illustrate with taste, of course.

Jennifer

tusker at 14:33 on 13 June 2008  Report this post
Thanks Sarah. I wouldn' t mind a shell garden. It would cut down on the weeding.

Jennifir

crowspark at 11:52 on 14 June 2008  Report this post
I found this charming and funny, Jennifer. Loved postman
Pam, Scruff the dog and tea, no milk and two sugars.
Thanks for the read

tusker at 14:34 on 14 June 2008  Report this post
Thanks Bill. I' m not in serious mode this week.

Jennifer

Bunbry at 10:53 on 07 August 2010  Report this post
I like the fairytale theme of this Jennifer but didn't notice the blossoming romance the others spotted - might be worth egging that up a bit!

As she was not a postman but a postwoman, you might want to call her 'Postie Pam'

Nick

Laurence at 11:32 on 07 August 2010  Report this post
Nice one Jennifer it has stirred me to get into the garden and do some tidying up!

Laurence

Desormais at 07:35 on 08 August 2010  Report this post
This was a good story Jennifer. I enjoyed it - very atmospheric.


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