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Therapy Dog
Posted: 16 November 2007
Word Count: 56
Summary: For the challenge, I think.
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He wanted to pet her head, a nest of hair he called it, rather than Theo's. She'd read that autistics cannot discriminate among details, so everything appeared important.
Theo licked her hand. The boy rubbed harder—and she made herself sit, stay, as if it were the world he rubbed out, and she, the only thing left.
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Comments by other Members
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 tiger_bright at 13:32 on 16 November 2007
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Hi Randall, it took me a couple of read-throughs to get this. Theo is the dog, yes? The "she" is the therapist and "the boy" is the autistic patient? Theo seemed an unusual name for a dog, which is why I stumbled at first. If you want to help your poor obtuse readers (that's me, that is), then renaming the dog Rex or something more typically canine might help? Not that I believe in being spoon-fed, but...
I really like the idea of the boy choosing to pet the woman instead of the dog. And the dog licking her hand at the same time. There seems to be a special bond between the three of them. Very touching.
Tiger
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 V`yonne at 13:57 on 16 November 2007
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That Tiger and me are both thick! I had the same trouble - couldn't work out which was who... But it's a lovely image when you get there.
Oonah
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Dreamer at 14:06 on 16 November 2007
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Hi Randall,
I liked this. You won't believe this but when we were looking for pups last month we went to a breeder and the parents of the litter were named Theo and Chilli. What got me was that Theo was the mother and Chilli the father...
I had to re read this too but not because of the dog's name. Perhaps if you reversed this: | Theo licked her hand. The boy rubbed harder |
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Of course once you re read it you get it so maybe that is fine. Not bad to have a piece that makes you think.
B.
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Forbes at 17:22 on 16 November 2007
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Randell
this certainly made me think about who does what to whom - and why. A poignant piece - a moment of breakthrough? And told in so few words.
TFR
Avis
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Jordan789 at 18:35 on 16 November 2007
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Lovely little story. I would maybe like to see it longer, to see who these people are. But it works remarkably in such a small dose. An image. What an image.
"The boy rubbed harder... as if it were the world he rubbed out, and she, the only thing left."
Jordan
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crazylady at 21:29 on 16 November 2007
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You really make the reader do all the work, but boy it's well worth it.
Such a clever take on the prompt and a poignant picture.
TFR
CL
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Jumbo at 08:33 on 17 November 2007
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Hi
As others have said - difficult to get into, but most satisfying when you do!
Thanks for this
john
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Cholero at 13:09 on 17 November 2007
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Randall
I had to work hard to decipher this. Theo seems such a particularly human name, such an un-dog name, that I think it's working against the story here.
The image we're left with of her sat having her head rubbed by an autistic boy in some kind of silent tableau is moving and strange, like you've grabbed at something out of a hidden world and opened your palm to show us.
Despite the initial struggle to get a hold of it, it's v effective and powerful, like a picture you know you shouldn't look at because it's mess up you head...
She'd read that autistics cannot discriminate among details, so everything appeared important.
-the force of the grammar pushes this to mean that everything appeared important to her. Break it into to sentences? Or put appeared into present tense to match 1st half of sentence?
Best
Pete
<Added>
scuse typos
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choille at 21:23 on 17 November 2007
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Hi Randall,
I'll need to revisit & really have a study as I think my head has just turned to mush, plus better half insists on watching telly just now & telly sits next to computer. It's a telly off tale.
All the best
Caroline.
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 crowspark at 22:00 on 17 November 2007
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This is a very twisted flash. He wants to pet the therapist's head rather than the dog. The dog completes the circle by licking the therapist. The therapist takes on the discipline of the dog, "sit, stay" and we end with the intensity of focus of the autistic boy who cannot discriminate details and for who the head is everything.
Just one minor nit. You have come this far -- just cut one word and you have a 55er!
Top flash
Bill
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choille at 22:37 on 17 November 2007
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Hi Randall,
Had a look at Bill's map & got there eventually.
Very clever in such a small word count.
| as if it were the world he rubbed out, and she, the only thing left. |
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very poignant.
Just as well you have the title you do or it would be impossible to work out.
Clever stuff.
All the best
Caroline.
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 Prospero at 06:13 on 18 November 2007
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Hey Randall
I didn't get it till I read Tiger's comment, but once you get there it is a great story. I love that insight into Autistics, they occupy such a different space, you wonder if they are not a new evolutionary branch.
Thanks for the read
Best
Prospero
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