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The Legacy

by tusker 

Posted: 14 November 2007
Word Count: 307
Summary: Cheated a bit. This is a part of a 3,000 words story.


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Before he threw himself off Devil's Rock, Sadie's father sent her a note asking for forgiveness. Now she is back in their holiday chalet; a chalet full of childhood memories.
'Damn you!' Sadie screams above the roar of a howling wind and raging sea, outside. 'Damn you!' she screams again, hurling an empty bottle of red wine at a boarded up window.
Suddenly, the chalet door blows open. Spinning around, half-expecting him to enter, a candle wobbles in the fierce draught and it topples down from the parafin heater to the floor. Then a single flame snakes out to play with the fringes of an old armchair sending little darts of fire scurrying.
The wooden chalet creaks and the swinging door crashes back and forth against a Formica table as the wind's breath strokes her cheeks like an anxious caress.
Walking over to the door, Sadie lifts her face up to the wind and seaspray remembering her father once saying as they piled driftwood onto a bonfire, 'Fire is a cleanser, Sadie.' And she recalls him on another occasion telling her as he bathed her cut toe with a handful of seaweed and seawater that salt was nature's great healer.
FIRE. SALT. Now his words are imprinted on her mind. They dip, dive across her vision. FIRE. SALT. The sea heaves like a mass of black treacle and darkness spreads outwards without any trace of an horizon. A hand seems to push her outside and as she stumbles over pebbles away from the chalet, her father's words dance and writhe on top of crashing waves, before her.
Now icy water buffets her bare feet and legs. Now its leaping up to her thighs and raising her arms above her head, letting salt water batter her body, she watches her father's chalet explode into a ball of fire.






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Comments by other Members



V`yonne at 15:33 on 14 November 2007  Report this post
Jennifer, didn't seem like a cheat at all. Very fitting passage. It was cathartic to watch that cabin go up in flames.

Well I have a total block on this one. Just can't get an angle on it but I'll read all the rest.

No rum for me this week then eh Sean?

Surface.

Prospero at 18:45 on 14 November 2007  Report this post
Very good, Jennifer, the storm without reflecting the storm within.

I particularly liked this line

The sea heaves like a mass of black treacle and darkness spreads outwards without any trace of an horizon.


I uber pick if I may. You can't have an empty bottle of red wine but you can have an empty red wine botttle.

Best

John

rosiedlm at 23:18 on 14 November 2007  Report this post
Hi Jennifer,

I really liked the way storm reflected her emotions although I wasn't quite sure whether she actually drowns or is standing in the water because her father's ghost has pushed her out of the cabin to escape the explosion.

All the best,
Rosie

tusker at 13:52 on 15 November 2007  Report this post
Hi John,
Thanks for your comments and pick. God, that wine was strong.
Regards Jennifer

tusker at 13:54 on 15 November 2007  Report this post
Hi Rosie,

No she didn't drown, Sadie was healed by the sea salt and the burning down of her father's chalet. It's originally a long story edited right down to the nub. Thanks for your comments.
Regards,
Jennifer


Account Closed at 10:10 on 16 November 2007  Report this post
Ooh, another dramatic one! And a very strong character too.

:))

A
xxx

tusker at 14:15 on 16 November 2007  Report this post
Hi Anne,
Thanks for kind comment. Wish I could write happy but I might surprise myself.
Regards,
Jennifer


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