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Lover`s Apartment

by Ambitions of Lisa 

Posted: 10 November 2007
Word Count: 237

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I stir
In crisp white sheets
You breathe
I open my eyes to see your gaze
You had watched
As I slept content
In our bed

The sun
Shines through thin white curtains
Onto your face
You stroke my hair softly
Kiss me
Before we make love
Like every morning

A breeze
Drifts through balcony doors
The river
Sounds calm and peaceful
As I bring you breakfast outdoors
Like every Sunday

The music
Fills our fresh sweet home
Scented candles
Add to the light breeze to create
Aromatic air
As you lay with me
On our sofa

I drink
The champagne you pour
You touch me
Massaging the curve of my thigh
As we watch
The film we rented last night
About love

I cook
Your favourite Asian cuisine
In the kitchen
I wear only your white shirt
As you stare
Planning what dessert is going to be
I know

The bubbles
Invite me into a Jacuzzi bath
As you warm
A soft towel on the heated rail
To dry me
As I step out of the soothing hot water
Into your arms

The moon
A spotlight on our balcony
You take me
For our nightly sensual fun
City sirens
Drown out my moans of lust
My passion

Being held
The way you hold me in bed
Makes me feel
Safe, desired and protected
As I drift
And dream, you smell my hair
You love me

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Comments by other Members

DeepBlueGypsy at 18:06 on 11 November 2007  Report this post
Lovely! Enjoyable read!
There only two things I question- where you meaning to only have white as the color mentioned?
crisp white sheets

thin white curtains

your white shirt

and I like this imagery, but the word "through" repeted in two stanzas back to back doesn't seem to do this poem justice.
Shines through thin white curtains

Drifts through balcony doors

Ah the romance! Thanks for sharing. DBG

joanie at 18:25 on 11 November 2007  Report this post
Wow, Lisa, if this is based on fact, it sounds absolute perfection! It is beautifully sensuous. Please tell me it's wishful thinking or my life will suddenly seem to be terribly mundane.

I like the precise pattern, with the short first and last lines of each stanza, but I can't get to grips with the capitals, I'm afraid; it's a personal thing, I know. Also, I'm puzzled by the one and only comma in the penultimate line. Interesting!

I enjoyed the sentiments and the 'read'.



Tina at 07:49 on 12 November 2007  Report this post

All I can say about this writing is I WISH!

Very smooth to read and full of images - I was waiting for a punchline that brought me up sharp but there was none - hope it is true for you.


Ambitions of Lisa at 23:07 on 12 November 2007  Report this post
Thanks DBG, Joanie and Tina..

Unfortunately... it's fiction... :(
Wishful thinking, a dream. I liked the images it created, and the colour 'white' was repeated to symbolise pure love.
Maybe one day ;)

Not sure about the punctuation either :S


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