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Homeless, hopeless

by Stacey 

Posted: 08 October 2003
Word Count: 85
Summary: quite experimental..I really hope this shouldnt hit home for anybody, I tried to be careful with the words I chose, don't mean to offend in any way. So apart from that, any positive or other criticism is welcome as ever!Thanks guys.
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Take a closer look.
Why must you judge me?
You don’t even know me.

Take a closer look.
Do you think I like to wear a frown?
But sometimes I forget how to smile.

Take a closer look.
Am I not ashamed of the crack in my glasses?
Sure, but its not like I can afford to have them fixed.

Take a closer look.
Do you see that scar on my forehead?
My Father didnt. That appeared the night I ran away..

From his fist.






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Comments by other Members



Fearless at 21:00 on 09 October 2003  Report this post
Stacey

I am surprised that noone has commented on this piece. It's brutally sparse, simple and expressive. You paint an image one sees in any major city in the world...the forgotten ones....'cept we never forget to judge them......so what does that say about the likes of us?

Fearless
Helpful (0) Made Me Think (0) Made Me Smile (0) Pure Genius (0)

Ticonderoga at 23:28 on 10 October 2003  Report this post

Very potent and clear-sighted. 'Cast a cold eye' as Yeats said. The phrase is often misunderstood, but you can do it. very fine and powerful.

Best,

mike
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Stacey at 12:14 on 13 October 2003  Report this post
Fearless & Ticonderoga,
Thank you very much for the kind comments. Much appreciated.
Best wishes,
Stacey.
Helpful (0) Made Me Think (0) Made Me Smile (0) Pure Genius (0)


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