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Handwritten

by Dreamchameleon 

Posted: 23 September 2007
Word Count: 209


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Ah... What ecstasy on a page caressed, pen to paper
ink that glistens wet and sinuous, turns to pretty
squiggles, sensuous curves, austere lines,
playful dots and commas, all a-dance on stage.
Hand helpless led by quill, this way, that way to
choreograph a mad ballet; virtuoso shape of words
and letters that circle here, leap there. Words
that twirl in loving pairs while others joyfully pirouette.
They all whirl and twirl to the sound of secret music;
a rhythm, that for now, only the hand perceives.
Dancers that convene mysteriously, later
part in dainty adieux, yet again change shape
as they regroup. Anew they dance; sometimes
as angels, clowns or demons, they bring joy,
announce sorrow, they comfort, wallow in love,
they challenge and entertain. And what is more,
they do so with Soul, for those handwritten words
are the only ones truly alive, with body, spirit, shape
and heart. Unlike that soulless keyboard tapping,
graphic leap on screen, as democracy on paper
all so equal, so up to date, perfectly formed letters dead,
each and everyone all same, in nature morte nothing
out of place. Whether yours or mine, who could tell...?
For the hand never gave them life, they possess
no soul, no heart, no breath.








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Comments by other Members



joanie at 23:04 on 24 September 2007  Report this post
Hello, DC. I do like the sentiments here; in this age of texting and emails, handwriting is just so sensuous! I like 'they dance; sometimes/as angels, clowns or demons'.

I wonder if this is a bit wordy; I love short poems, so I'm very biased, but I think it would benefit from some pruning.

I enjoyed the read!

joanie

Beanie Baby at 21:19 on 01 October 2007  Report this post
Hi Dreamy. I adore his. I feel that nothing in the entire world comes anywhere close to the thrill of putting words on paper. Computers and mobile texting is all very convenient but nothing nothing matches the physical act of writing on beautiful paper with a beautiful pen!

I also feel this piece could do with a bit of gentle pruning. The words you use are so beautiful anyway but often, less is more.If you would like me to give it a more thorough critique, drop me a line and I'll be happy to oblige!

Beanie

Account Closed at 15:18 on 05 October 2007  Report this post
Lovely images, but it would be even stronger and sassier with pruning, and stanza divisions. And a punchier ending too. What about:

A page caressed, pen to paper,
ink that glistens, wet and sinuous,
turns to pretty squiggles,
sensuous curves, austere lines,
playful dots and commas.

Hand helpless in the quill,
this way, that way
to choreograph this mad ballet;
virtuoso shape of words,
letters that circle here, leap there.

Words that twirl in loving pairs
while others pirouette.
They whirl to the sound of secret music;
a rhythm that only the hand
perceives.

Dancers that convene mysteriously
part in dainty adieux.
Anew they dance; as angels,
clowns or demons, they bring joy,
announce sorrow, they comfort,
wallow in love, challenge, entertain.

And they do it all with Soul:
those handwritten words
the only ones truly alive,
body, spirit, shape
and heart.
Unlike that soulless keyboard

tapping, graphic leap on screen,
democracy on paper.
All so equal, the perfectly formed letters
dead, each and every one all the same,
nothing out of place.

Whether yours or mine, who can tell...?
They possess no soul, no heart, no breath:
the hand never gave them life.


Certainly got me thinking anyhow!

A
xxx

Dreamchameleon at 22:54 on 05 October 2007  Report this post
Thanks A! your absolutely right!


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