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ocean blue

by degas 

Posted: 05 October 2003
Word Count: 40
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the succulent ocean
blue
tidal tribes and
waves
caress the shoreline
crisp
cool seas bathe
and
dark currents swell
sharp
knives of coldness
cut
clear water crystal
deep
hymns seep through
into
the underwater world
my
sanctuary and my
heart






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Anna Reynolds at 13:53 on 10 October 2003  Report this post
Degas, this is lovely simple, stark, pure writing. The way that each line can be read as part of the last or next line is great. Do you need the dashes at the end of those lines, I wonder? In some ways they inhibit when you look at the poem. The simplicity of the language is a joy to read.
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degas at 11:45 on 12 October 2003  Report this post
Thank-you I have written poetry on and off for about 15 years but never had the confidence to air it in public Looking at your profile,your comments give me a considerable boost to learn and enjoy this new world
You are right about the dashes going to delete them now!

Thanks again

Colin
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